Figuratively and literally today!
The weather was spectacular all day. I celebrated by turning over my little garden plot. Dig dig dig.
Also, I opened all the windows and doors and gave the house a much-needed airing out.
Unfortunately I burned something very very badly in the kitchen last night (damn you laundry distraction!). Even after freezing us with all the windows open until bedtime, fans running full blast, scrubbing the stove top, washing the range hood screens, even taking apart the fan to clean -- even after ALL THAT WORK the inside of the cupboards even stink like smoke. I am genuinely afraid I may need to paint to seal in that burnt stench. I'll give it a few more days or even weeks (I am so glad spring is here so there is better air flow through the place).
Back to the digging.
While waiting for the "eco" shower cleaner to sink in, I pulled out everything in the linen closet and put it back in an orderly way (I love doing this BTW) and took a small pile of rags to my husband's rag bin in the garage (made him happy). A good warm up for decluttering!
Then I called my youngest into his room and told him he had to make sense of his catastrophe of a room. This didn't come out of the blue, even he has been complaining that it's too messy lately, so today was the day.
I sat with him in the middle of his room and picked up each thing to ask where it SHOULD go (not where does it FIT- that's how it got so disorganized in the first place). I know each category of toy has it's own bin.... lego, hotwheels, models, stuffies, even a miscellaneous doomahicky bin... so I got him to get out the bins so that he could easily toss each thing into the best bin for finding it next time he wants it! Revolutionary concept, I know!
At the end of it all, we found a few items that he decided weren't "worth" finding a home for, so off they went to the charity shop box. And there was a grocery bag of broken bits and paper scraps to get rid of too! Wow. Does his room ever look better now, and it didn't take nearly as long as it could have.
I felt so inspired by that success that I visited my dining linen and sorted, purged, and neatly put away in a logical order the table clothes, placemats and napkins. (I host the big family dinners, so these things are used at least 4 times a year.). In the process I found 8 placemats I no longer find "my style" and some cloth napkins that don't really go with my favourite placemats. ta-da! 20 less things in the drawers!
+++++++++++++++++
It happened again. The shower curtain was getting a bit stiff (and maybe whiffy too?) so I went to hang up the "spare" shower curtain to put the primary one in the wash basket... but I couldn't find the back-up! Where could it be? I looked in all the logical places. And didn't find it. I must have purged it already. And guess what? The world did not end! After the initial twinge of disapointment at the inconvenience of not having the spare.... I simply washed the primary one right away with a load of other stuff (there is ALWAYS other stuff with an active family of 4). Voila! clean shower curtain no fuss, and no chance for procrastination!!!!
4.14.2012
4.12.2012
Goal #15 Pantry Accounting
It's good to visit the pantry regularly to take stock, and check rotation to keep on top of expiry dates.
Goal #15 KNOW what's in my pantry right now!
Game plan: Take all the dry goods out of the pantry. Sort from oldest to newest of like items, make a note of anything that is running low and put it away with the most urgently dated items at the front!
Verdict: This is an exercise that always makes me feel very wealthy and secure! In about one hour --while waiting for a reply email -- it was all done. Now I know what I currently have ample amounts of, and what I still haven't touched from my last pantry audit (and therefore leave off future shopping lists!)
Goal #15 KNOW what's in my pantry right now!
Game plan: Take all the dry goods out of the pantry. Sort from oldest to newest of like items, make a note of anything that is running low and put it away with the most urgently dated items at the front!
Verdict: This is an exercise that always makes me feel very wealthy and secure! In about one hour --while waiting for a reply email -- it was all done. Now I know what I currently have ample amounts of, and what I still haven't touched from my last pantry audit (and therefore leave off future shopping lists!)
4.11.2012
Goal #16 Framed
This goal is a bit different.
Residue from when we listed our house briefy last year... a few boxes of "personal" decor that were removed to neutralize the house for showings. Of those boxes, the hardest one to deal with after the house was un-listed is the one with framed family phots. They are great photos in carefully selected frames.
BUT the problem is I like my walls better with l e s s on them... and therefore putting the photos back up would be clutter.
What could the solution be?
I love the photos - they make me happy and connected to family that has passed, and my boy's younger cute-ness.
I am seriously concidering taking the pictures out of the frames, scanning them and putting the originals in a plain photo album. The idea makes me sad that they won't be displayed, but less sad than the idea of putting the pictures back up. Is that crazy?
So my goal is to find a respectful and wonderful way to honor the pictures in a place I can visit often enough (like when they were on the wall). I can't put them back up, I like the space better clearer.
Any ideas would be appreciated.
(PS a digital frame is not an option because I loathe cables dangling down the wall)
Residue from when we listed our house briefy last year... a few boxes of "personal" decor that were removed to neutralize the house for showings. Of those boxes, the hardest one to deal with after the house was un-listed is the one with framed family phots. They are great photos in carefully selected frames.
BUT the problem is I like my walls better with l e s s on them... and therefore putting the photos back up would be clutter.
What could the solution be?
I love the photos - they make me happy and connected to family that has passed, and my boy's younger cute-ness.
I am seriously concidering taking the pictures out of the frames, scanning them and putting the originals in a plain photo album. The idea makes me sad that they won't be displayed, but less sad than the idea of putting the pictures back up. Is that crazy?
So my goal is to find a respectful and wonderful way to honor the pictures in a place I can visit often enough (like when they were on the wall). I can't put them back up, I like the space better clearer.
Any ideas would be appreciated.
(PS a digital frame is not an option because I loathe cables dangling down the wall)
4.06.2012
Clutter Creep
I had an opportunity to do something different with my life the last couple weeks, and with hesitation I went for it. The result was that I was working away from my desk (and even away from my town) for 3 days and coming home in the evening.
You would think with no one home for all day the house couldn't possibly get messy, right?
WRONG!
Somehow only having time to cook, eat, do dishes and prepare for the next day made the little messes that the family makes in the evening accumulate. Clutter had creeped onto every surface and into every nook. Lego, remote controls, homeworks sheets, half folded laundry, computer accesories, novels, etc, etc... the result was chaos that looked like a grittier version of the after Christmas morning mess. And in every room of the house too!
Thankfully I was able to spend the morning tidying. Then the afternoon cleaning. Hubby worked on the yard.... a winter of neglect had to be acknowledged out there.
It was an eye-opening experience. Apparently I do more tidying throughout the day than I give myself credit for!
The adventure that was my out of town contract is over for now, but apparently I did a good job and they do want me back... and that's good, because now I will be better prepared.
You would think with no one home for all day the house couldn't possibly get messy, right?
WRONG!
Somehow only having time to cook, eat, do dishes and prepare for the next day made the little messes that the family makes in the evening accumulate. Clutter had creeped onto every surface and into every nook. Lego, remote controls, homeworks sheets, half folded laundry, computer accesories, novels, etc, etc... the result was chaos that looked like a grittier version of the after Christmas morning mess. And in every room of the house too!
Thankfully I was able to spend the morning tidying. Then the afternoon cleaning. Hubby worked on the yard.... a winter of neglect had to be acknowledged out there.
It was an eye-opening experience. Apparently I do more tidying throughout the day than I give myself credit for!
The adventure that was my out of town contract is over for now, but apparently I did a good job and they do want me back... and that's good, because now I will be better prepared.
4.05.2012
Goal #14 Paper Monster
One thing that fills me with dread is the thought of throwing away papers that I am supposed to keep. And likewise keeping too many papers for too long can be a real threat to my clutter anxiety.That is where GOAL #14 comes from... slaying the dreaded paper monster one sheet at a time!
Step one: Pull out the giant box of "old papers" to a place that I may actually feel good about sitting for an hour or so.
Step two: Pull the papershredder and recycling pags to the same place.
Step three: decide on what year will be my cut off for bank statements, bills, etc. And decide what items I will want to keep no matter what year thery were from (employment letters, receipts for cars I still have, etc)
Step four: pour myself a tall glass of water and grab a snack, then DIVE IN!
Verdict: I made the cut-off 10 years for most of it (I'm sure any time before that nobody cares about but me.) The still relevant stuff from before then (house improvements, car repairs, major life events) went into a special envelope called "PRE-2002". Some papers were so boring that they could be tossed right into recycling without any identity compromises, but MOST of it needs to be shredded. That hungry machine worked hard for me today and the kids had fun feeding it! I ended up with a FULL bag one of (those large clear ones) of shred that will go to the curb with my next recycling pick up day.
My ugly box of "old papers" was practically empty, so I moved some papers from my file cabinet to the box... then I actually put it away before it languished in my livingroom for too long! (Huge step for me!)
My mom says she keeps envelopes that say "SHRED AFTER XX-XX-20XX" so that she doesn't even have to sort later. I may adopt that technique.
Step one: Pull out the giant box of "old papers" to a place that I may actually feel good about sitting for an hour or so.
Step two: Pull the papershredder and recycling pags to the same place.
Step three: decide on what year will be my cut off for bank statements, bills, etc. And decide what items I will want to keep no matter what year thery were from (employment letters, receipts for cars I still have, etc)
Step four: pour myself a tall glass of water and grab a snack, then DIVE IN!
Verdict: I made the cut-off 10 years for most of it (I'm sure any time before that nobody cares about but me.) The still relevant stuff from before then (house improvements, car repairs, major life events) went into a special envelope called "PRE-2002". Some papers were so boring that they could be tossed right into recycling without any identity compromises, but MOST of it needs to be shredded. That hungry machine worked hard for me today and the kids had fun feeding it! I ended up with a FULL bag one of (those large clear ones) of shred that will go to the curb with my next recycling pick up day.
My ugly box of "old papers" was practically empty, so I moved some papers from my file cabinet to the box... then I actually put it away before it languished in my livingroom for too long! (Huge step for me!)
My mom says she keeps envelopes that say "SHRED AFTER XX-XX-20XX" so that she doesn't even have to sort later. I may adopt that technique.
3.31.2012
Imagination exercise revisited
The moving plan I posed on the 13th of last month isn't going quite as planned.
It's not that I don't have boxes lying around... Unfortunately I do. There is a 4 cubic foot assortment of "stuff" that is homeless right now wandering from room to room.
It's crap (I mean precious belongings) that came from my office when it was bad that made its way to the laundry room of doom that then got moved to the family room when the renovations started in there! It got moved back to the office and had to get shuffled back to the laundry room when the office had to be tidy for a meeting... And back to the family room when it was time to hang the ceiling in the LR... It's waiting there now, making the family room too messy to be relaxing.
I'm frustrated by this seemingly endless cycle!
Back to the "moving plan"... Only a few items have left the house since my grand packing idea. Some progress is better than none I suppose. If I think about it in space savings - not much yet.
The goal I've been setting are successful in measurable ways, so I'm not being too tough on myself about the moving exercise slowness. Part of the thing that is hanging me up is the boxes chaos that the packing would cause. Part of it is that work has picked up (yay) to the point of needed a lot of my time. More importantly the pretty, sentimental things that are essentially useless are the things I find the hardest to part with (at least mostly). This has been a good way to handle it though, because I have to really LOOK at each item (pretending to pack it) and re evaluate whether I still feel attached to it or whether the item is something that has blended into the background of it's place in the house.
Whenever my honest reaction leans towards ambivalence I get to expel it! (after taking a picture if there are nice memories associated) Slow and steady. Maybe the "moving" day can just be bumped a while, after all it's not a complete loss as an exercise.
It's not that I don't have boxes lying around... Unfortunately I do. There is a 4 cubic foot assortment of "stuff" that is homeless right now wandering from room to room.
It's crap (I mean precious belongings) that came from my office when it was bad that made its way to the laundry room of doom that then got moved to the family room when the renovations started in there! It got moved back to the office and had to get shuffled back to the laundry room when the office had to be tidy for a meeting... And back to the family room when it was time to hang the ceiling in the LR... It's waiting there now, making the family room too messy to be relaxing.
I'm frustrated by this seemingly endless cycle!
Back to the "moving plan"... Only a few items have left the house since my grand packing idea. Some progress is better than none I suppose. If I think about it in space savings - not much yet.
The goal I've been setting are successful in measurable ways, so I'm not being too tough on myself about the moving exercise slowness. Part of the thing that is hanging me up is the boxes chaos that the packing would cause. Part of it is that work has picked up (yay) to the point of needed a lot of my time. More importantly the pretty, sentimental things that are essentially useless are the things I find the hardest to part with (at least mostly). This has been a good way to handle it though, because I have to really LOOK at each item (pretending to pack it) and re evaluate whether I still feel attached to it or whether the item is something that has blended into the background of it's place in the house.
Whenever my honest reaction leans towards ambivalence I get to expel it! (after taking a picture if there are nice memories associated) Slow and steady. Maybe the "moving" day can just be bumped a while, after all it's not a complete loss as an exercise.
3.29.2012
Putting a number on Minimalism
A lot of minimalists like to have number limits on belongings.
Project 333, 100 things challenge, etc. I love these blogs and projects for motivating me, but honestly a number limit doesn't quite work for me. The milder versions have less constraints, but of course even the "you don't need more than 8 of anything" rule feels too restrictive.
Let me explain
I don't need more than 8 shirts..... ? Or is that no more than 8 long sleeved shirts? Or is that no more than 8 long sleeved button up shirts? Where do I draw the line at the classification of each thing? 8 pants? Or 8 jeans, plus 8 cords and 8 pairs of slacks? See the problem?
One thing is for sure, even with 8 of EVERY category, my fashionista sister would never understand any limit but the constraints of how much she can CRAM into her large closet and 3 dressers (and of course the off season closet and the formal wear wardrobe too).
My preference is a compromise. The limits are not numerical absolutes, and they aren't maximum capacity space constraints either... I figure if I can easily find what I need within the closet (or drawer)and everything in there is what I can wear NOW (the right size, and in good repair and a style I like) then that should be the perfect amount!
With this special density, the one-in-one-out rule is completely necessary. Otherwise things can very quickly slip into an over-crowded chaos.
Just ask my pantry... it is over the comfortable-access-capacity on a regular basis!
Project 333, 100 things challenge, etc. I love these blogs and projects for motivating me, but honestly a number limit doesn't quite work for me. The milder versions have less constraints, but of course even the "you don't need more than 8 of anything" rule feels too restrictive.
Let me explain
I don't need more than 8 shirts..... ? Or is that no more than 8 long sleeved shirts? Or is that no more than 8 long sleeved button up shirts? Where do I draw the line at the classification of each thing? 8 pants? Or 8 jeans, plus 8 cords and 8 pairs of slacks? See the problem?
One thing is for sure, even with 8 of EVERY category, my fashionista sister would never understand any limit but the constraints of how much she can CRAM into her large closet and 3 dressers (and of course the off season closet and the formal wear wardrobe too).
My preference is a compromise. The limits are not numerical absolutes, and they aren't maximum capacity space constraints either... I figure if I can easily find what I need within the closet (or drawer)and everything in there is what I can wear NOW (the right size, and in good repair and a style I like) then that should be the perfect amount!
With this special density, the one-in-one-out rule is completely necessary. Otherwise things can very quickly slip into an over-crowded chaos.
Just ask my pantry... it is over the comfortable-access-capacity on a regular basis!
3.22.2012
Goal #13 The Junk Drawer
Be afraid, be very afraid! The junk drawer is a common fixture for most families. It's the place to find a screwdriver, tape, the spare batteries and everything else that was left on the counter that didn't have a kitchen task to do.
Goal #13 Clean Out the Junk Drawer
Background: I have a confession. There is more than ONE junk drawer in this house. There is the standard kitchen one, one in the living room, one in the diningroom and even one in my office.
Challenge: One drawer at a time, clean out what shouldn't be there and re-assess what should.
__________________________________________
Process: With each location, get some materials set out ahead of time. Prepare a large flat surface to sort on, 4 baskets (toss, keep, put away, donate) and cleaning supplies for wiping out the drawer once it's emptied. Next empty the drawer ALL THE WAY EMPTY onto the flat surface. Then take a moment to enjoy the cleared space.... ah, doesn't that feel good? Now you can look at what you were storing in there.... the garbage should be obvious the broken bits and dead batteries (I have them, you do too right?) The stuff that found it's way to the drawer instead of "home" should also be obvious. DON'T GET DISTRACTED HERE: put the items in the "put away" basket for now. Take the time to focus on what's in the "keep" basket. Is it a duplicate? Does it belong in the drawer? Any wires can now be labelled and tied up tidy, a small container might be handy for keeping the screwdriver bits together, etc etc. Now you get to put the "keep" stuff back. You can see if a divider, or small baskets would help out (not until after the purge though). Back to the "put away" basket.... Why was it in the drawer? Is it's home in the right place? Easy to find and there when you need it? Is it a duplicate?
Verdict: It's not called a junk drawer for nothing! I think gremlins are putting weird crap in there. Used napkin in the livingroom drawer anyone? Busted plastic battery cover for a lost toy in the kitchen? On the bright side I found a DVD series that I borrowed last summer that I can now return (how embarassing). The drawers are now easier to open, close and find stuff in -- I love my clean drawers! Of course I know that this challenge needs to be visited regularly and often.
Goal #13 Clean Out the Junk Drawer
Background: I have a confession. There is more than ONE junk drawer in this house. There is the standard kitchen one, one in the living room, one in the diningroom and even one in my office.
Challenge: One drawer at a time, clean out what shouldn't be there and re-assess what should.
__________________________________________
Process: With each location, get some materials set out ahead of time. Prepare a large flat surface to sort on, 4 baskets (toss, keep, put away, donate) and cleaning supplies for wiping out the drawer once it's emptied. Next empty the drawer ALL THE WAY EMPTY onto the flat surface. Then take a moment to enjoy the cleared space.... ah, doesn't that feel good? Now you can look at what you were storing in there.... the garbage should be obvious the broken bits and dead batteries (I have them, you do too right?) The stuff that found it's way to the drawer instead of "home" should also be obvious. DON'T GET DISTRACTED HERE: put the items in the "put away" basket for now. Take the time to focus on what's in the "keep" basket. Is it a duplicate? Does it belong in the drawer? Any wires can now be labelled and tied up tidy, a small container might be handy for keeping the screwdriver bits together, etc etc. Now you get to put the "keep" stuff back. You can see if a divider, or small baskets would help out (not until after the purge though). Back to the "put away" basket.... Why was it in the drawer? Is it's home in the right place? Easy to find and there when you need it? Is it a duplicate?
Verdict: It's not called a junk drawer for nothing! I think gremlins are putting weird crap in there. Used napkin in the livingroom drawer anyone? Busted plastic battery cover for a lost toy in the kitchen? On the bright side I found a DVD series that I borrowed last summer that I can now return (how embarassing). The drawers are now easier to open, close and find stuff in -- I love my clean drawers! Of course I know that this challenge needs to be visited regularly and often.
3.15.2012
Goal #12: Spring must be coming
The seasonal "sport" of gardening accumulates a lot of stuff, even for a casual participant like me.
Goal #12: Gardening Paraphernalia: Part 1
Background: Because I garden on impulse pretty much exclusively, I have too many impulse purchases tucked away in various areas of the house and yard. A practical aspirational clutter, because I WANT to grow more than I do, but rarely follow through. I'm quite sure I have duplicates, duds and expired stuff in the mix.
Challenge: Keep only the things that work best, that are relevant to my current garden and are still viable.
________________________________________________
Process: In part 1 of this challenge, focus on the gardening materials that are kept indoors.
Start by pulling all the gardening things together to really see what there is. Set out a large, easy-clean area to make the inventory... then get searching. That means going into the darkest recesses of the garage, laundryroom, under the sinks, etc. ... you know where you hide this stuff. Ask the tough questions: Is it broken? Why did I buy this? Do I use it? Do I need it? Is this still relevant to the plants I have now? Has it expired?
Verdict: I found duplicates of fertilizer in almost every cupboard. I guess I think I use it more than I really do. I also found seeds that I had bought for my last house (I have lived here for 12 years!) I think if I haven't planted them by now, I won't be -- and that's provided they are even still alive. I know now with certainty where the supplies are and what I have BEFORE the impulse Spring planting season arrives here!
Goal #12: Gardening Paraphernalia: Part 1
Background: Because I garden on impulse pretty much exclusively, I have too many impulse purchases tucked away in various areas of the house and yard. A practical aspirational clutter, because I WANT to grow more than I do, but rarely follow through. I'm quite sure I have duplicates, duds and expired stuff in the mix.
Challenge: Keep only the things that work best, that are relevant to my current garden and are still viable.
________________________________________________
Process: In part 1 of this challenge, focus on the gardening materials that are kept indoors.
Start by pulling all the gardening things together to really see what there is. Set out a large, easy-clean area to make the inventory... then get searching. That means going into the darkest recesses of the garage, laundryroom, under the sinks, etc. ... you know where you hide this stuff. Ask the tough questions: Is it broken? Why did I buy this? Do I use it? Do I need it? Is this still relevant to the plants I have now? Has it expired?
Verdict: I found duplicates of fertilizer in almost every cupboard. I guess I think I use it more than I really do. I also found seeds that I had bought for my last house (I have lived here for 12 years!) I think if I haven't planted them by now, I won't be -- and that's provided they are even still alive. I know now with certainty where the supplies are and what I have BEFORE the impulse Spring planting season arrives here!
3.08.2012
Goal #11 Growing Growing GONE
As kids grow, they out-grow clothes, boots and jackets, mittens, hats, etc... timing is everything.
Goal #11 - Kid's Clothing
Background: Both kids being boys means that one gets the hand-me downs of the other. That has worked well up until recently when their very different bodyshapes and clothing tastes showed differences that made hand-me-downs not so wonderful.
Challenge: Go through the kid's clothes and reduce the items that don't fit, aren't favourites or are in bad shape. And maybe even set LIMITS to how many of each kind of garment they each own (fit comfortably in the space provided even when everything is clean - or a number limit).
________________________________
Process: Pull out the clothes that are in current circulation and ask the kids about each piece: Does this still fit? Why don't you wear this? Wear is the match to this sock/glove/PJ set? An enlightening set of questions for some of it!
Verdict: It took a while... a whole weekend with many many interruptions. I won't deny it. There were tears. Apparently the reason why some of these items are in such bad shape is because they are FAVOURITES and not willingly relinquished. I let them keep a couple outfits as "grub" clothes because I have some grub clothes in my closet too for dirty chores.... but with the warning that if I saw them worn to school then they might just lose them! Some things were hard for me to let go- stuff I thought was quite flattering or good quality but they didn't want -- since it will be on their bodies, I let it go.
I'm sure some parent trying to put clothes on their kids will appreciate what I have donated, and the messed over ones have beefed up my husband's rag supply.
Goal #11 - Kid's Clothing
Background: Both kids being boys means that one gets the hand-me downs of the other. That has worked well up until recently when their very different bodyshapes and clothing tastes showed differences that made hand-me-downs not so wonderful.
Challenge: Go through the kid's clothes and reduce the items that don't fit, aren't favourites or are in bad shape. And maybe even set LIMITS to how many of each kind of garment they each own (fit comfortably in the space provided even when everything is clean - or a number limit).
________________________________
Process: Pull out the clothes that are in current circulation and ask the kids about each piece: Does this still fit? Why don't you wear this? Wear is the match to this sock/glove/PJ set? An enlightening set of questions for some of it!
Verdict: It took a while... a whole weekend with many many interruptions. I won't deny it. There were tears. Apparently the reason why some of these items are in such bad shape is because they are FAVOURITES and not willingly relinquished. I let them keep a couple outfits as "grub" clothes because I have some grub clothes in my closet too for dirty chores.... but with the warning that if I saw them worn to school then they might just lose them! Some things were hard for me to let go- stuff I thought was quite flattering or good quality but they didn't want -- since it will be on their bodies, I let it go.
I'm sure some parent trying to put clothes on their kids will appreciate what I have donated, and the messed over ones have beefed up my husband's rag supply.
3.01.2012
Goal #10 Scrub a Dub Duds
How many sweet smelling bodywash gels does one person need?
Goal #10
Reduce perfumes, lotions & soaps
Background: I know I must be hard to buy for, because I get a lot of pretty "spa" sets for gift occassions. While I appreciate the scent-iment, I can't possibly use all of any one set before the next one comes along. Then there is the trouble of the moisturizing lotions... I really prefer an unscented moisturizer.
Challenge: Reduce the lotions, soaps and perfumes to the ones that are most loved and used regularly... and not expired.
----------------------------
Process: Pull everything scented from the livingroom, office, & bathrooms (you never know when the urge to smell pretty may come along) Beware of lotions that have been there for YEARS... if they haven't been used by now, SHOULD THEY BE?!
Verdict: So many pretty smells! It was hard to get rid of some of these because they were given with love and I genuinely liked the scents. BUT like I said above I prefer an unscented moisturizer.... so I kept one favourite for summer legs and got rid of the rest. I consolodated two half used hair spray bottles to one and binned several scrubs and bubble baths that I haven't reached for in 5 years. The unopened lotions are in the donate box now. So my bathroom drawers are roomier and there are none but my very favourite to reach for now.
Goal #10
Reduce perfumes, lotions & soaps
Background: I know I must be hard to buy for, because I get a lot of pretty "spa" sets for gift occassions. While I appreciate the scent-iment, I can't possibly use all of any one set before the next one comes along. Then there is the trouble of the moisturizing lotions... I really prefer an unscented moisturizer.
Challenge: Reduce the lotions, soaps and perfumes to the ones that are most loved and used regularly... and not expired.
----------------------------
Process: Pull everything scented from the livingroom, office, & bathrooms (you never know when the urge to smell pretty may come along) Beware of lotions that have been there for YEARS... if they haven't been used by now, SHOULD THEY BE?!
Verdict: So many pretty smells! It was hard to get rid of some of these because they were given with love and I genuinely liked the scents. BUT like I said above I prefer an unscented moisturizer.... so I kept one favourite for summer legs and got rid of the rest. I consolodated two half used hair spray bottles to one and binned several scrubs and bubble baths that I haven't reached for in 5 years. The unopened lotions are in the donate box now. So my bathroom drawers are roomier and there are none but my very favourite to reach for now.
2.29.2012
Uh-Oh
Decluttering is a beautiful thing.
The process that liberates the space is like fresh air coming into my lungs!
But...
That thing that isn't supposed to happen keeps happening -- I find myself "missing" things I have purged!
My niece was over playing with my old toys, and I found myself regretting not having my blond Barbie anymore for her to play with -- she is blond, so she likes blond dolls. And my Barbie clothes are VERY limited now. Then again for something that gets played with maybe once a year, it's quite probably enough! In the end she had fun with the Latina one (I kept the Korean, Japanese and Spanish) and still found enough outfits to have a great little plot going.
And I did get my hair cut. SHORT. Short hair needs product, but I'd already decluttered my short hair goos. I now have 1 mousse and 1 light hold hairspray to work with. At first I resented "losing" the stuff, but you know what? I figured it out WITHOUT buying anything new!
Sometimes I find myself looking for a book, trying to find an obscure serving dish or a bagged-out sweater that have already been let go. There is a pang of disappointment, doubt and maybe even regret. But it's just a pang, and I always seem to be able to find away around the lack without serious consequences.
I guess that means I didn't really NEED it after all, right?
I still have a LOOOOONG way to go in this decluttering process. More dragons to slay more hang ups to get over, more crap to wade through before I will truly feel successful at this. But I am moving forward and every step feels lighter letting me know this is the right path for me.
The process that liberates the space is like fresh air coming into my lungs!
But...
That thing that isn't supposed to happen keeps happening -- I find myself "missing" things I have purged!
My niece was over playing with my old toys, and I found myself regretting not having my blond Barbie anymore for her to play with -- she is blond, so she likes blond dolls. And my Barbie clothes are VERY limited now. Then again for something that gets played with maybe once a year, it's quite probably enough! In the end she had fun with the Latina one (I kept the Korean, Japanese and Spanish) and still found enough outfits to have a great little plot going.
And I did get my hair cut. SHORT. Short hair needs product, but I'd already decluttered my short hair goos. I now have 1 mousse and 1 light hold hairspray to work with. At first I resented "losing" the stuff, but you know what? I figured it out WITHOUT buying anything new!
Sometimes I find myself looking for a book, trying to find an obscure serving dish or a bagged-out sweater that have already been let go. There is a pang of disappointment, doubt and maybe even regret. But it's just a pang, and I always seem to be able to find away around the lack without serious consequences.
I guess that means I didn't really NEED it after all, right?
I still have a LOOOOONG way to go in this decluttering process. More dragons to slay more hang ups to get over, more crap to wade through before I will truly feel successful at this. But I am moving forward and every step feels lighter letting me know this is the right path for me.
2.23.2012
Goal #9 Variety is not always the spice of Life
Keeping a spice "just in case" seems like a good idea when you love to cook as much as I do, but in truth if the lid hasn't been opened in 5 years, it's probably not worth using even if the perfect recipe presents itself tomorrow!
Goal #9
Clear out the spice drawer (and cupboards too)
Background: I LOVE cooking! The flavours from around the world excite me... so as a result I have amassed an enviable selection of spices and herbs. There needs to be a time limit to this culinary collection (there are recommended time lines, but I'm too frugal to rotate them THAT often).
Challenge: Time to get realistic about what has expired, and what is not going to be used again. This will leave room to more easily find what is regularly used and what is loved in the spice drawer! Gather all the bottle spices from the spice drawer, bin of spice bags, and economy size spice jars from around the kitchen and purge the ignored, expired and "not my taste" flavours from these locale.
___________________________________
Verdict: Under 1/2 hour of time to do.... and now the spice drawer is so much easier to use! And the overflow to other cupboards is no longer a problem! 7 glass bottles, 4 small plastic shakers, 2 ziploc bags and a large jar (consolidated down to a small bottle) of spices/herbs removed from my kitchen.
Process: The kitchen smelled amazing as I dumped the old spices and herbs to recycle the glass bottles. I sneezed, and maybe even felt a little regret at "wasting" this resources.... but truthfully it was a long overdue chore.
Goal #9
Clear out the spice drawer (and cupboards too)
Background: I LOVE cooking! The flavours from around the world excite me... so as a result I have amassed an enviable selection of spices and herbs. There needs to be a time limit to this culinary collection (there are recommended time lines, but I'm too frugal to rotate them THAT often).
Challenge: Time to get realistic about what has expired, and what is not going to be used again. This will leave room to more easily find what is regularly used and what is loved in the spice drawer! Gather all the bottle spices from the spice drawer, bin of spice bags, and economy size spice jars from around the kitchen and purge the ignored, expired and "not my taste" flavours from these locale.
___________________________________
Verdict: Under 1/2 hour of time to do.... and now the spice drawer is so much easier to use! And the overflow to other cupboards is no longer a problem! 7 glass bottles, 4 small plastic shakers, 2 ziploc bags and a large jar (consolidated down to a small bottle) of spices/herbs removed from my kitchen.
Process: The kitchen smelled amazing as I dumped the old spices and herbs to recycle the glass bottles. I sneezed, and maybe even felt a little regret at "wasting" this resources.... but truthfully it was a long overdue chore.
2.16.2012
Goal #8 Sewing Notions
I haven't dragged my sewing machine out in years... I still want to use it someday, so it's not going anywhere, but what about all the bits and bobs that are in that sewing box?
Goal #8
Donate all outdated materials that aren't being useful RIGHT NOW and can be easily replaced when I take up sewing again.
Background: I really enjoyed sewing. Oddly, I did it a lot more before I had kids. I inherited a large quantity of fabrics, laces and bindings from the various elders in my family... and what do you know.... I don't use them!
Challenge: Be realistic about what I will use. If I haven't found a need for it in this last decade, why do I still think I may need it someday? Donate the excess now and enjoy the space it frees up!
-------------------------------------------
Verdict: Better than expected! I gave a box of great-granny's laces and bindings to a niece that loves making small figures (she loved it). I also gave her a jar of buttons and most of my threads and ribbons.
Process: All of these things were already together so it wasn't a hard challenge. 15 minutes from dusting off and opening the bin to closing it back up again. It was easy once the decision was made... I did feel a little catch in my throat when I came upon my grandma's hand-crocheted lace. I kept that. Just one roll. It's just too pretty and sentimental (and not replaceable).
Goal #8
Donate all outdated materials that aren't being useful RIGHT NOW and can be easily replaced when I take up sewing again.
Background: I really enjoyed sewing. Oddly, I did it a lot more before I had kids. I inherited a large quantity of fabrics, laces and bindings from the various elders in my family... and what do you know.... I don't use them!
Challenge: Be realistic about what I will use. If I haven't found a need for it in this last decade, why do I still think I may need it someday? Donate the excess now and enjoy the space it frees up!
-------------------------------------------
Verdict: Better than expected! I gave a box of great-granny's laces and bindings to a niece that loves making small figures (she loved it). I also gave her a jar of buttons and most of my threads and ribbons.
Process: All of these things were already together so it wasn't a hard challenge. 15 minutes from dusting off and opening the bin to closing it back up again. It was easy once the decision was made... I did feel a little catch in my throat when I came upon my grandma's hand-crocheted lace. I kept that. Just one roll. It's just too pretty and sentimental (and not replaceable).
2.13.2012
Imagination Exercise
Since my sister won't "rob" me like I was hoping, I have to find a new way to shake up this blind addiction to my everyday stuff.
A kind of shock therapy could be helpful.
How about pretending I am moving?
Even better, pretending I am DOWNSIZING!
Or I could get crazy here and pretend I am downsizing and moving to a different continent! ooooh.... that may be a better challenge farther down the road... for now I will stick to the idea of just moving.
Moving means sorting, purging, prioritizing and really weighing if something is worth the time and effort of taking it along.... sounds like a great decluttering exercise!
I am no stranger to moving. At last count I have called 48 locations "home" in my lifetime (and I've lived in this house for nearly 12 years!), my parents did not live together and they both had the itch to move very regularly - hence the stupidly high number. Those itchy feet have passed down to me and the only things that have stopped me from continuing the trend forever was: A) Money and B) My Husband (and kids). I have "settled" here in that the offers on the other houses have fallen through over the years one way or another and we aren't desperate to take a hit to leave this place. Our house is pretty good actually. Cheap enough to maintain small enough that it can be maintained and has evolved over the years to accommodate our changing needs. The location is on the edge of rural enough for my country-boy-husband while central enough for work-at-home me -- and the school only a short walk away has been a unifying part of my kids' academic and social life so far.
Moving involves a pulling-out of EVERYTHING. Every single item needs to be prioritised as it is packed: occassionally used stuff gets packed first, decorative items and other non-essentials go into boxes next, then the everyday items need to be weighed as to how badly they will be missed when they are packed... until finally you are down to the bare minimum that fits in one tote for the morning of the move. It's an exhilarating process! (or is that just me?)
Then there are the dregs .... Everything that is trash or unloved or isn't important enough to come-with -- in short everything you don't want to pack -- is either tossed or sold.... or if you are a lazy mover, hucked into a miscellaneous box to be sorted (and loathed) on the other side.
If this mindul, evaluative, methodical process can be used on each room of my current house, I will surely end up with less than I have now and really know what it is that I have chosen to move on with. If while taking this action, I pretend to be moving into a home with LESS STORAGE it will be even better!
So many of the places I have thought to live in over the years actually do have less storage than this place... this house really has obscene amounts of shelving for a home this size! It may open up new opportunities to have less storable crap. More opportunities, and less stuff, that sounds good to me.
Let's pretend....
Parameters: It's conceivable that a future house could easily be 100 sqft smaller with 1 less kitchen cupboard, 1/2 the pantry, and a storage space a fraction of the size we have now!
Timeframe: 8 weeks is realistic. Countdown to April 9th as the theoretical moving day!
A kind of shock therapy could be helpful.
How about pretending I am moving?
Even better, pretending I am DOWNSIZING!
Or I could get crazy here and pretend I am downsizing and moving to a different continent! ooooh.... that may be a better challenge farther down the road... for now I will stick to the idea of just moving.
Moving means sorting, purging, prioritizing and really weighing if something is worth the time and effort of taking it along.... sounds like a great decluttering exercise!
I am no stranger to moving. At last count I have called 48 locations "home" in my lifetime (and I've lived in this house for nearly 12 years!), my parents did not live together and they both had the itch to move very regularly - hence the stupidly high number. Those itchy feet have passed down to me and the only things that have stopped me from continuing the trend forever was: A) Money and B) My Husband (and kids). I have "settled" here in that the offers on the other houses have fallen through over the years one way or another and we aren't desperate to take a hit to leave this place. Our house is pretty good actually. Cheap enough to maintain small enough that it can be maintained and has evolved over the years to accommodate our changing needs. The location is on the edge of rural enough for my country-boy-husband while central enough for work-at-home me -- and the school only a short walk away has been a unifying part of my kids' academic and social life so far.
Moving involves a pulling-out of EVERYTHING. Every single item needs to be prioritised as it is packed: occassionally used stuff gets packed first, decorative items and other non-essentials go into boxes next, then the everyday items need to be weighed as to how badly they will be missed when they are packed... until finally you are down to the bare minimum that fits in one tote for the morning of the move. It's an exhilarating process! (or is that just me?)
Then there are the dregs .... Everything that is trash or unloved or isn't important enough to come-with -- in short everything you don't want to pack -- is either tossed or sold.... or if you are a lazy mover, hucked into a miscellaneous box to be sorted (and loathed) on the other side.
If this mindul, evaluative, methodical process can be used on each room of my current house, I will surely end up with less than I have now and really know what it is that I have chosen to move on with. If while taking this action, I pretend to be moving into a home with LESS STORAGE it will be even better!
So many of the places I have thought to live in over the years actually do have less storage than this place... this house really has obscene amounts of shelving for a home this size! It may open up new opportunities to have less storable crap. More opportunities, and less stuff, that sounds good to me.
Let's pretend....
Parameters: It's conceivable that a future house could easily be 100 sqft smaller with 1 less kitchen cupboard, 1/2 the pantry, and a storage space a fraction of the size we have now!
Timeframe: 8 weeks is realistic. Countdown to April 9th as the theoretical moving day!
2.10.2012
My boys are growing
As the kids grow there are eras that are outgrown. The ample amounts of baby gear and strollers have long since been passed down to neighbours and friends. In the past are the chunky primary coloured toddler toys and sandbox gear. Replaced with tiny bits of lego, hotwheels, skateboards, bikes and electronic gadgets. Now that they are older, they make many of their own decisions regarding toys.
Let it be said here... older brother is not very good at passing down his toys... even if he doesn't want them anymore, he doesn't like "giving" them to his brother. It's been a stress-point since the beginning. I try not to get in the middle of the battles, but I do have to mediate from time to time to keep either from collecting too much broken or worn out items or paying too much or trying to take back items after a deal has been reached, etc etc... and I will sometimes pre-empt the transaction by selling or donating the item to prevent younger from having too much (failing miserably with that BTW).
Up until very recently, I have kept my older boy's clothing after he's outgrown to be hand-me-down to the younger (elastic waist bands are forgiving for different shapes) it takes between 2-4 years depending on the timing of their growth spurts. There is a place in the storage closet for these things and totes marked and rotated.
Suddenly a new era has appeared.
Young boy is heftier than the slim older one... and there aren't a lot of adjustable waist bands on the pre-teen sizing. Not much CAN be passed down I realised last size switch. Out of 12 pairs of pants he could only wear 5! The rest went to charity after storing for so long... kind of annoying really.
Here is the dilemma... do I keep the totes for the years in between ages "just in case" the clothes will fit and be appealing to the younger one? Or do I let the skinny jeans go now and just accept that more money will be spent when the time comes for the younger to need new pants?
Let it be said here... older brother is not very good at passing down his toys... even if he doesn't want them anymore, he doesn't like "giving" them to his brother. It's been a stress-point since the beginning. I try not to get in the middle of the battles, but I do have to mediate from time to time to keep either from collecting too much broken or worn out items or paying too much or trying to take back items after a deal has been reached, etc etc... and I will sometimes pre-empt the transaction by selling or donating the item to prevent younger from having too much (failing miserably with that BTW).
Up until very recently, I have kept my older boy's clothing after he's outgrown to be hand-me-down to the younger (elastic waist bands are forgiving for different shapes) it takes between 2-4 years depending on the timing of their growth spurts. There is a place in the storage closet for these things and totes marked and rotated.
Suddenly a new era has appeared.
Young boy is heftier than the slim older one... and there aren't a lot of adjustable waist bands on the pre-teen sizing. Not much CAN be passed down I realised last size switch. Out of 12 pairs of pants he could only wear 5! The rest went to charity after storing for so long... kind of annoying really.
Here is the dilemma... do I keep the totes for the years in between ages "just in case" the clothes will fit and be appealing to the younger one? Or do I let the skinny jeans go now and just accept that more money will be spent when the time comes for the younger to need new pants?
2.09.2012
Goal #7 Cables and Cords
Got a Gadget? It most likely comes with a cable or 2....
Goal #7
Reduce, organize the cables/cords to what is used/needed.
Background: Adapters, charges, connectors all over the place....my junk drawer is full of them.... what are they all for anyways?!
Challenge: Find the gadget that the cable/cord goes to and label the cord. Edit duplicates and redundant items.
____________________________________
Verdict: Mixed results. There were some charger cables that I just had no clue what they went to (and I'm afraid to throw them out in case the thingy show up needing a charge! BUT I did find a handful of USB cables that were identical, so I picked 3 favourites of varying lengths (one for each computer) for the many items they can be used with and donated the rest.
Process: Junk Drawer, office drawer, laundry room bin, bedroom side table, coffee table drawer... they all had cables! I pulled them all into one place and sorted the redundant from the good. (I really don't think I need 75 ft of phone cables anymore with all the cordless phones in the house). With the wireless router working so reliably these days, 4 different ethernet wires are redundant now too. Unfortunately it was a huge challenge finding the gadgets to go with the charger cables. The ones I found, I did label. the ones I did not find are now living in a clear plastic shoe box in my storage space. I'm not sure this goal is "done" exactly. But so far, it's taken a couple hours.... yes I'm that disorganized and had that many cables!
Goal #7
Reduce, organize the cables/cords to what is used/needed.
Background: Adapters, charges, connectors all over the place....my junk drawer is full of them.... what are they all for anyways?!
Challenge: Find the gadget that the cable/cord goes to and label the cord. Edit duplicates and redundant items.
____________________________________
Verdict: Mixed results. There were some charger cables that I just had no clue what they went to (and I'm afraid to throw them out in case the thingy show up needing a charge! BUT I did find a handful of USB cables that were identical, so I picked 3 favourites of varying lengths (one for each computer) for the many items they can be used with and donated the rest.
Process: Junk Drawer, office drawer, laundry room bin, bedroom side table, coffee table drawer... they all had cables! I pulled them all into one place and sorted the redundant from the good. (I really don't think I need 75 ft of phone cables anymore with all the cordless phones in the house). With the wireless router working so reliably these days, 4 different ethernet wires are redundant now too. Unfortunately it was a huge challenge finding the gadgets to go with the charger cables. The ones I found, I did label. the ones I did not find are now living in a clear plastic shoe box in my storage space. I'm not sure this goal is "done" exactly. But so far, it's taken a couple hours.... yes I'm that disorganized and had that many cables!
2.03.2012
Snapshots of L E S S
Here are some pictures of recently released items... (I must make a habit of taking pictures more often.)
2.02.2012
Goal #6 Pretty Little Things
All that glitters is not gold. Earrings, bracelets, necklaces, broaches, watches, hair accessories all have a way of coming into the home but never leaving (they don't take up much room). I think NOW is the time to admit that some of these pretty things have overstayed their usefulness (or fashion era!).
Goal #6
Keep only the Beauty Accessories that are flattering, that I love or have real sentimental value.
Background: I don't really have a problem in this area.... or at least I didn't think I did until I dragged it all out onto my bed! Little boxes and baskets housed an amazing quantity of sparkly bits!
Challenge: Be ruthless! Cull all jewelry down to the most beloved. Cull all but the best quality hair accessories. Bin the broken, soiled or odds, bag the rest for charitable thrift donation.
______________________________
Verdict: From 6 bins and baskets down to one jewelry box (and a small hair accessories basket) in less than an hour. I now know where every piece is, and I know every bit works properly)
Process: Put each box, basket and bin onto my bed in front of the full length mirror. Got a big tray out for safe sorting. Asked the questions of each item: Does this work the way it's supposed to? Do I have all the pieces? Do I still like it (this is where the mirror comes in handy)? Is it comfortable to wear? Does it have any cash value (I don't have much in the way of "real" jewelry so not much fits this category for me)? Some choices were really easy.... bold patterned scrunchies?! broken earrings?!
BONUS! During this cull process, many empty baskets and pretty boxes presented themsleves. Some I repurposed (replacing uglier ones) and left overs went off to my favorite thrift shop as donations. Not an easy thing for me to do... I find small storage boxes almost as appealling as what in them.
Goal #6
Keep only the Beauty Accessories that are flattering, that I love or have real sentimental value.
Background: I don't really have a problem in this area.... or at least I didn't think I did until I dragged it all out onto my bed! Little boxes and baskets housed an amazing quantity of sparkly bits!
Challenge: Be ruthless! Cull all jewelry down to the most beloved. Cull all but the best quality hair accessories. Bin the broken, soiled or odds, bag the rest for charitable thrift donation.
______________________________
Verdict: From 6 bins and baskets down to one jewelry box (and a small hair accessories basket) in less than an hour. I now know where every piece is, and I know every bit works properly)
Process: Put each box, basket and bin onto my bed in front of the full length mirror. Got a big tray out for safe sorting. Asked the questions of each item: Does this work the way it's supposed to? Do I have all the pieces? Do I still like it (this is where the mirror comes in handy)? Is it comfortable to wear? Does it have any cash value (I don't have much in the way of "real" jewelry so not much fits this category for me)? Some choices were really easy.... bold patterned scrunchies?! broken earrings?!
BONUS! During this cull process, many empty baskets and pretty boxes presented themsleves. Some I repurposed (replacing uglier ones) and left overs went off to my favorite thrift shop as donations. Not an easy thing for me to do... I find small storage boxes almost as appealling as what in them.
1.26.2012
Goal #5 Book Clutter
Reading is an amazing hobby. It educates, entertains and can whisk you away to places as far reaching as your imagination can travel... just open the pages and away you go (no batteries required). Purging books is like purging friends somehow...
Goal #5;
Edit book collection. The primary goal is to release the commitment of reading so many of the books that have made their way (with honorable intentions) into the house - a realistic time limit of one year to read it should be helpful. Secondary goal is to make every book have a real home in the correct bookshelf.
Background: Like so many others, I love a good book. And I have a hard time letting go of a good book too. It's too easy to happily pick up a few books at the thrift store that look interesting (or that the kids might like). The problem lies in the sheer QUANTITY of books that I am still trying to find time to read! A massive bookshelf is not enough. My kids each have a good sized bookshelf... but all their books don't fit either. It's hard to find what you want, and worse, it's a heavy burden with so much yet to be read (exciting, but still a burden when the time just isn't available).
Challenge: Set realistic expectations for what can/should be read in the next year. Go through the ones that have been read and decide if they are worth reading again... if they are, can they be found at the library? Also see if any of the books in the kid's rooms are not enjoyed or outgrown (we do this regularly, interests change often). Then sort which may be useful to the school library, and the rest can go to the charitable thrift store... put the boxes in the trunk of the car to leave immediately! Let them go to be experienced by the next eager reader!
___________________________________
Verdict: Some success, it was a challenge to actually convince myself that there wasn't enough time in a year to read them all... brutal choices had to be made for this goal!
Process: One bookshelf at a time. Every book was pulled off the shelf to be categorized, inspected for damage and sorted. This gave me the wonderful bonus of putting the "keeper" books in logical order as I put them back!
Goal #5;
Edit book collection. The primary goal is to release the commitment of reading so many of the books that have made their way (with honorable intentions) into the house - a realistic time limit of one year to read it should be helpful. Secondary goal is to make every book have a real home in the correct bookshelf.
Background: Like so many others, I love a good book. And I have a hard time letting go of a good book too. It's too easy to happily pick up a few books at the thrift store that look interesting (or that the kids might like). The problem lies in the sheer QUANTITY of books that I am still trying to find time to read! A massive bookshelf is not enough. My kids each have a good sized bookshelf... but all their books don't fit either. It's hard to find what you want, and worse, it's a heavy burden with so much yet to be read (exciting, but still a burden when the time just isn't available).
Challenge: Set realistic expectations for what can/should be read in the next year. Go through the ones that have been read and decide if they are worth reading again... if they are, can they be found at the library? Also see if any of the books in the kid's rooms are not enjoyed or outgrown (we do this regularly, interests change often). Then sort which may be useful to the school library, and the rest can go to the charitable thrift store... put the boxes in the trunk of the car to leave immediately! Let them go to be experienced by the next eager reader!
___________________________________
Verdict: Some success, it was a challenge to actually convince myself that there wasn't enough time in a year to read them all... brutal choices had to be made for this goal!
Process: One bookshelf at a time. Every book was pulled off the shelf to be categorized, inspected for damage and sorted. This gave me the wonderful bonus of putting the "keeper" books in logical order as I put them back!
1.20.2012
Living the dream
How would real-life be if this house was ideal?
How much would have to go before it's truly great in here?
I had a test run of that idea when we had our place listed for sale last summer. All extraneous things were removed to my sister's garage to make the house "show-home ready". The good news is the extra stuff (aka "clutter" to a potential buyer) took up less than half her single car space.... maybe 6ft cubed if that. It was a wonderful way to live in my husband's eyes.
Yes, daily cleaning was quick, rewarding and easy.
BUT certain, inevitably necessary things were missing. The biggest example, bulky seasonal items were removed (coats quilts, boots, etc.) it opened the closets right up (very nice) but in "real -life" we need these things.
By going through the process of decluttering piece by piece I hope to get to that peaceful living space that we had when the house was listed, without sacrificing real life for all seasons.
How? I am really evaluating the value each item adds to our daily life and weighing that against the cost of physical space it occupies.
So far so good.... I've lost count of the number of bags and boxes that have left since I started worrying about clutter.... still a long way to go though... and I'm up for it!
How much would have to go before it's truly great in here?
I had a test run of that idea when we had our place listed for sale last summer. All extraneous things were removed to my sister's garage to make the house "show-home ready". The good news is the extra stuff (aka "clutter" to a potential buyer) took up less than half her single car space.... maybe 6ft cubed if that. It was a wonderful way to live in my husband's eyes.
Yes, daily cleaning was quick, rewarding and easy.
BUT certain, inevitably necessary things were missing. The biggest example, bulky seasonal items were removed (coats quilts, boots, etc.) it opened the closets right up (very nice) but in "real -life" we need these things.
By going through the process of decluttering piece by piece I hope to get to that peaceful living space that we had when the house was listed, without sacrificing real life for all seasons.
How? I am really evaluating the value each item adds to our daily life and weighing that against the cost of physical space it occupies.
So far so good.... I've lost count of the number of bags and boxes that have left since I started worrying about clutter.... still a long way to go though... and I'm up for it!
1.19.2012
Goal #4 Office Supplies
A natural transition from craft supplies is stationery, this goal I have tackled before, but somehow the pens, clips and everything else office-supply-like seems to multiply on their own. Especially after digging out the craft items.
Goal #4
Reduce Office Supplies to What I Use, Need & Love
Background: How many mediocre pens does a family of 4 need? I admit I have a bit of a stationery addiction. I love pens, markers, pencil crayons, tape, glue, paper, clips and bins.... they are just begging to CREATE something. I get positively giddy in the big-box office supply places... and there lies the problem. I'm always happy to find a different pen or drawing stick.... and even if they are sub-standard, they stick around languishing in drawers or bins.
Challenge: Take all these supplies from every corner of the house and edit, edit, edit to a reasonable and practical amount of supplies. Take the excess to the school for their use. Remove the duds to the bin.
_______________________________________________
Process: All in one pile, each item was tested (pens, markers, scissors, glue, stapler, etc...), then the useful items sorted by category. Each category was then judged strictly.... Is it being used? Is it a favourite? How many of this item is really needed?
Verdict: small bag to trash (half-used notebooks, dead pens, old markers, dried out glue sticks...). And a decent sized box taken to the school: crayons, hole punches, primary scissors, fancy paper, stickers, rulers, pencil boxes, pencil sharpeners, blank notebooks, etc. The entire sort/purge took 1.5 hours while watching a favourite chick flick for the 100th time -- it was almost fun! And the best part is NOW I know what there actually is in the house in the way of supplies (and tht they all work) and where to go when I need them! A very liberating feeling.
Goal #4
Reduce Office Supplies to What I Use, Need & Love
Background: How many mediocre pens does a family of 4 need? I admit I have a bit of a stationery addiction. I love pens, markers, pencil crayons, tape, glue, paper, clips and bins.... they are just begging to CREATE something. I get positively giddy in the big-box office supply places... and there lies the problem. I'm always happy to find a different pen or drawing stick.... and even if they are sub-standard, they stick around languishing in drawers or bins.
Challenge: Take all these supplies from every corner of the house and edit, edit, edit to a reasonable and practical amount of supplies. Take the excess to the school for their use. Remove the duds to the bin.
_______________________________________________
Process: All in one pile, each item was tested (pens, markers, scissors, glue, stapler, etc...), then the useful items sorted by category. Each category was then judged strictly.... Is it being used? Is it a favourite? How many of this item is really needed?
Verdict: small bag to trash (half-used notebooks, dead pens, old markers, dried out glue sticks...). And a decent sized box taken to the school: crayons, hole punches, primary scissors, fancy paper, stickers, rulers, pencil boxes, pencil sharpeners, blank notebooks, etc. The entire sort/purge took 1.5 hours while watching a favourite chick flick for the 100th time -- it was almost fun! And the best part is NOW I know what there actually is in the house in the way of supplies (and tht they all work) and where to go when I need them! A very liberating feeling.
1.13.2012
More or Less
More is just... "more"... not "better", not "new & improved"
More money spent
More space needed
More resources used
More responsibility
More trips to the store &
More trips to the landfill
For now, the planet may appreciate it if we say "enough" instead of "more" for a while....
More money spent
More space needed
More resources used
More responsibility
More trips to the store &
More trips to the landfill
For now, the planet may appreciate it if we say "enough" instead of "more" for a while....
1.12.2012
Goal #3 Craft Clutter
The hardest part of clutter is when you come across something you REALLY wanted to complete, but didn't. There is guilt over the money spent, regret over not having accomplished it, and embarrassment over having forgotten about it for so long.
In my life, it is especially painful finding a craft that I intended on doing with my young boys -- they are not so young any more. Plaster casts of tiny feet, finger paint and stringing beads are no longer cute rainy day activities. That boat has sailed and I am sad that I missed some opportunities.
Goal #3;
Find NEW homes for the craft supplies that we have all outgrown (yes there are lots of well-intentioned projects for mom that never got completed too)
Background: Even after many purges of this type of thing, I still have some unopened or gently explored craft supplies intended for the primary years! From fuzzy craft bits to a small mountain of crayola crayons, stickers, play-dough, these items are tucked away all over the house.
Challenge: Gather ALL the supplies to one place, make decisions, donate to the local Boys & Girls Club programs... after all my youngest boy did do preschool there and they are wonderful people that do wonderful things for the local kids. Or find other appropriate homes that the supplies can go to in less than a week -- no lingering regrets!
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Verdict: This was one heck of a goal, I had no idea what I was getting into! This one took 6 hours to complete (not including transit to the B&G club -- that's happening tomorrow)
Process: I had to open every drawer, every cupboard and every closet to search all of it out (and I'm pretty sure I have missed some). I piled it all in the family room and sorted it first into keep/purge piles then into age-appropriate bags. Whenever possible I just set the entire bin to be donated (why keep a container when they could use it?). Some decisions were very easy.... for example colourful pompoms and popsicle sticks are not needed here any more.... and the robot flannels I intended to make PJs out of will find more appreciation with my sewing neighbour that has a 2 year old. Other things were more challenging.... my niece still enjoys play-dough quite a bit, it would be nice to keep it around for when she is here...
In my life, it is especially painful finding a craft that I intended on doing with my young boys -- they are not so young any more. Plaster casts of tiny feet, finger paint and stringing beads are no longer cute rainy day activities. That boat has sailed and I am sad that I missed some opportunities.
Goal #3;
Find NEW homes for the craft supplies that we have all outgrown (yes there are lots of well-intentioned projects for mom that never got completed too)
Background: Even after many purges of this type of thing, I still have some unopened or gently explored craft supplies intended for the primary years! From fuzzy craft bits to a small mountain of crayola crayons, stickers, play-dough, these items are tucked away all over the house.
Challenge: Gather ALL the supplies to one place, make decisions, donate to the local Boys & Girls Club programs... after all my youngest boy did do preschool there and they are wonderful people that do wonderful things for the local kids. Or find other appropriate homes that the supplies can go to in less than a week -- no lingering regrets!
----------------------------------------------
Verdict: This was one heck of a goal, I had no idea what I was getting into! This one took 6 hours to complete (not including transit to the B&G club -- that's happening tomorrow)
Process: I had to open every drawer, every cupboard and every closet to search all of it out (and I'm pretty sure I have missed some). I piled it all in the family room and sorted it first into keep/purge piles then into age-appropriate bags. Whenever possible I just set the entire bin to be donated (why keep a container when they could use it?). Some decisions were very easy.... for example colourful pompoms and popsicle sticks are not needed here any more.... and the robot flannels I intended to make PJs out of will find more appreciation with my sewing neighbour that has a 2 year old. Other things were more challenging.... my niece still enjoys play-dough quite a bit, it would be nice to keep it around for when she is here...
1.08.2012
Daily Grind
With a picture of what my ideal space SHOULD be, this daily process of selecting things to donate away is getting easier.
(Time willing) Every item I come across is getting interrogated:
Even though I just took 2 decent sized boxes away last week (Post-Christmas cull), There is now another box almost full today. The dining cabinet that houses the table linens got a once-over today. I found a variety of things to part with: candle holders that aren't my cup of tea anymore, and some tea cups too, a stoneware platter that I never really liked (a gift), a stainless steel martini shaker that leaks to the point of me never wanting to touch it, and a couple picture frames (what were they even doing there?). All that hiding and crowding the linens and platters that are actually used!
The cupboard works better now. And that is the whole point of this exercise -- make the space work for the life I live now.
(Time willing) Every item I come across is getting interrogated:
"What have you done for me lately?"
"Why should I keep you around to take up space and resources?"
"Is there something similar that works better or is preferred?"
"Will I suffer in any way if you are not in my life anymore?!"
Even though I just took 2 decent sized boxes away last week (Post-Christmas cull), There is now another box almost full today. The dining cabinet that houses the table linens got a once-over today. I found a variety of things to part with: candle holders that aren't my cup of tea anymore, and some tea cups too, a stoneware platter that I never really liked (a gift), a stainless steel martini shaker that leaks to the point of me never wanting to touch it, and a couple picture frames (what were they even doing there?). All that hiding and crowding the linens and platters that are actually used!
The cupboard works better now. And that is the whole point of this exercise -- make the space work for the life I live now.
1.05.2012
Goal #2: Take the boxes/paper accumulated over Christmas to recycling centre
Background: We hosted Christmas AND had out of town guests over the holidays, the result was a mountain of paper and cardboard. We have a recycling pick-up program, but the pick up day isn't for two weeks!
Challenge: Gather it all into the covered deck area (on a calm-weathered day), sort the various recyclables into appointed bags and deal with the non-recyclable left overs too. Then drive it all to the recycling centre and responsibly put it in the correct bins without going crazy (the place is a muddy garbage infested zoo of impatient people at the best of times).
-------------------------------
Verdict: Amazing! By setting it up as a challenge instead of a dreaded chore, I was able to get the tools ready ahead of time, gloves, bags ..... patience... and after 30 minutes of sorting I had everything sorted and bagged and in the back of the truck! I decided to see if they would take the Christmas tree too -- I wasn't going to have it languishing in the backyard until Spring like usual!
Process: As stated above, by being organized with the tools and clear of purpose it came together smoothly. I picked a windy but not too rainy day to do it, so there were moments when I was chasing down festive ribbons, but it got done in one afternoon, and now it's off my porch and out of my head! They took the tree for a nominal fee so that was a bonus. Amazing!
Background: We hosted Christmas AND had out of town guests over the holidays, the result was a mountain of paper and cardboard. We have a recycling pick-up program, but the pick up day isn't for two weeks!
Challenge: Gather it all into the covered deck area (on a calm-weathered day), sort the various recyclables into appointed bags and deal with the non-recyclable left overs too. Then drive it all to the recycling centre and responsibly put it in the correct bins without going crazy (the place is a muddy garbage infested zoo of impatient people at the best of times).
-------------------------------
Verdict: Amazing! By setting it up as a challenge instead of a dreaded chore, I was able to get the tools ready ahead of time, gloves, bags ..... patience... and after 30 minutes of sorting I had everything sorted and bagged and in the back of the truck! I decided to see if they would take the Christmas tree too -- I wasn't going to have it languishing in the backyard until Spring like usual!
Process: As stated above, by being organized with the tools and clear of purpose it came together smoothly. I picked a windy but not too rainy day to do it, so there were moments when I was chasing down festive ribbons, but it got done in one afternoon, and now it's off my porch and out of my head! They took the tree for a nominal fee so that was a bonus. Amazing!
12.29.2011
Last Goal for 2011
Introducing the 2012 strategy for my decluttering mission.... I am going to set a goal per week and journal the experience and results.
Since there is only a couple days left for this year.... I have to make it simple.
Goal #1
Find a home for my new pressure cooker that has easy access for frequent use.
Background- I got a pressure cooker for a pre-Christmas present. A 5 quart pot of manageable size and easy operation for fast, tasty vegetables (the 5 times I have used it so far I have been delighted with the results)! BUT at present there is NO SPACE in my cupboards to house it.... it has been living on my stovetop, and though that is convenient, it's not practical.
Challenge- Decide which cupboard location would be best (thinking of the goal) clearing space out until it fits.... that may mean re-prioritizing what lives in the cupboard and/or finding new homes for those things. (The trickle down effect is that ALL my cupboards are quite full, so no matter what, 5 quarts of volume must be evicted from SOMEWHERE to make room).
______________________________
Verdict- SUCCESS!
This challenge took 20 minutes from planning to completion. HOORAY!
Process- After deciding which cupboards would be acceptable for storing the pot, I narrowed it down to the most flexible cupboard close to the stove, and already housing the much loved slow cooker and griddle. Then I had to assess what could be moved from that space. The tetra packs for lunches could go elsewhere..... I decided the best place to edit was my cookbooks place. There are a few well-referenced publications, but 90% of the time these days I go to my favourite cooking websites before searching my collection of cookbooks. In short, they have served their purpose and are no longer needed -- thank you very much -- a big stack are off to a new home, and the tetra packs take their place.
Phew, the results are good. Everything is away and outdated materials that I have been ignoring are removed. A true de-cluttering success.
Since there is only a couple days left for this year.... I have to make it simple.
Goal #1
Find a home for my new pressure cooker that has easy access for frequent use.
Background- I got a pressure cooker for a pre-Christmas present. A 5 quart pot of manageable size and easy operation for fast, tasty vegetables (the 5 times I have used it so far I have been delighted with the results)! BUT at present there is NO SPACE in my cupboards to house it.... it has been living on my stovetop, and though that is convenient, it's not practical.
Challenge- Decide which cupboard location would be best (thinking of the goal) clearing space out until it fits.... that may mean re-prioritizing what lives in the cupboard and/or finding new homes for those things. (The trickle down effect is that ALL my cupboards are quite full, so no matter what, 5 quarts of volume must be evicted from SOMEWHERE to make room).
______________________________
Verdict- SUCCESS!
This challenge took 20 minutes from planning to completion. HOORAY!
Process- After deciding which cupboards would be acceptable for storing the pot, I narrowed it down to the most flexible cupboard close to the stove, and already housing the much loved slow cooker and griddle. Then I had to assess what could be moved from that space. The tetra packs for lunches could go elsewhere..... I decided the best place to edit was my cookbooks place. There are a few well-referenced publications, but 90% of the time these days I go to my favourite cooking websites before searching my collection of cookbooks. In short, they have served their purpose and are no longer needed -- thank you very much -- a big stack are off to a new home, and the tetra packs take their place.
Phew, the results are good. Everything is away and outdated materials that I have been ignoring are removed. A true de-cluttering success.
12.21.2011
Needs vs Wants & Gifts
When someone asks "What do you want for Christmas?" it is such a challenge for the budding minimalist!
"I have everything I need, really I do. I would be happy for your company". Is my response.
"But I asked you what you WANT not what you NEED?"
THERE IS THE CHALLENGE
There are LOTS of things a fledgling minimalist may WANT, but in the back of our minds is the assurance that that want will actually be a burden later as most of the "stuff" inevitably becomes. So we have to disappoint and frustrate our family and friends with requests for empty stockings and boxes.
WHERE IS THE BALANCE?
Giving thoughtfully with minimalist experience gifts is relatively easy compared to asking for the same consideration from those that don't share the same ideals about "stuff".... it's lost in translation somehow. At least that is my experience.
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Meanwhile there are things leaving my home by the box full and every pound less makes me feel lighter...
"I have everything I need, really I do. I would be happy for your company". Is my response.
"But I asked you what you WANT not what you NEED?"
THERE IS THE CHALLENGE
There are LOTS of things a fledgling minimalist may WANT, but in the back of our minds is the assurance that that want will actually be a burden later as most of the "stuff" inevitably becomes. So we have to disappoint and frustrate our family and friends with requests for empty stockings and boxes.
WHERE IS THE BALANCE?
Giving thoughtfully with minimalist experience gifts is relatively easy compared to asking for the same consideration from those that don't share the same ideals about "stuff".... it's lost in translation somehow. At least that is my experience.
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Meanwhile there are things leaving my home by the box full and every pound less makes me feel lighter...
12.19.2011
Naughty and Nice
If you are like me, the worst is over for the season. As of yesterday, I'd made my list, checked it twice and shopped, created and really carefully decided what would be nice for gifts this season. ALL OF THEM ARE ACCOUNTED FOR! Did I manage to avoid toxic portable power sources (batteries).... YES!
And I managed to sell a few items that still had lots of fun left in them that my boys had outgrown (they share the proceeds).
I hope you are close to finishing your list too.... and that you have stayed true to your budget, goals and heart for each gift....
And I managed to sell a few items that still had lots of fun left in them that my boys had outgrown (they share the proceeds).
I hope you are close to finishing your list too.... and that you have stayed true to your budget, goals and heart for each gift....
12.17.2011
Bad, Bad, Bad
I'm drywalling my laundry room right now.
Nothing makes you realize how much crap you have quite like clearing EVERYTHING out of a room. Just one room's worth of stuff spread around, and it has made the rest of the home almost unbearable!
It's a prime opportunity to cull the excess, and yet, it is so much easier to swear and kick at it while tripping over it.... or better yet ignore it completely until it can be shoved back into the nook it came from.
I WILL RESIST TAKING THE EASY WAY OUT!!!!
My office looks like an episode of some reality hoarding show and the family room looks no better.
What have I done?
Now ON TOP of the holiday chores and mayhem, I have added mudding, taping, sanding and "deal with it" to the list.
DEEP BREATHS.....
The tools are at hand: Bags for trash, boxes for donate.
(I have taken photo evidence of what's going on, but they won't be posted until the "after" shots are ready.)
Nothing makes you realize how much crap you have quite like clearing EVERYTHING out of a room. Just one room's worth of stuff spread around, and it has made the rest of the home almost unbearable!
It's a prime opportunity to cull the excess, and yet, it is so much easier to swear and kick at it while tripping over it.... or better yet ignore it completely until it can be shoved back into the nook it came from.
I WILL RESIST TAKING THE EASY WAY OUT!!!!
My office looks like an episode of some reality hoarding show and the family room looks no better.
What have I done?
Now ON TOP of the holiday chores and mayhem, I have added mudding, taping, sanding and "deal with it" to the list.
DEEP BREATHS.....
The tools are at hand: Bags for trash, boxes for donate.
(I have taken photo evidence of what's going on, but they won't be posted until the "after" shots are ready.)
12.02.2011
Gifts of Experience
Gifts of Experience can be a personal gift of time from yourself, or a gift card for an activity the recipient enjoys.
Presently I am creating some vouchers for my extended family for activities that I know they enjoy...
Possible vouchers include:
Other experience gifts may be:
The trick is finding the balance between how well the activity matches them, and how much time they will need to commit to it. It doesn't have to be expensive to be fun and meaningful!
Presently I am creating some vouchers for my extended family for activities that I know they enjoy...
Possible vouchers include:
- yoga time with friends,
- home cooked family meals,
- cooking lessons,
- spa days but the "spa" is your home (or their's)
- movie night of their choice
- gardening afternoons
- trips to the park/museum/mall/bike rides together... whatever activity they would like to do with you more often
- story-time / lego-time / game-time / craft-time / wiggle-time with youngsters
Other experience gifts may be:
- Resturant/Coffee certificate
- Movie/theatre Tickets
- Museum membership
- Swimming lessons/passes
- Sports memberships
- Art Classes
- Continuing education course in a class they are interested in
- Salon Gift Certificates
- Spa Gift Certificates
- Wine Appreciation Class
- Kayaking Lesson.... etc
The trick is finding the balance between how well the activity matches them, and how much time they will need to commit to it. It doesn't have to be expensive to be fun and meaningful!
11.25.2011
Think About the Power Source
The season has begun... I have been sneaking packages into the house and hiding them... sure the "big day" will be fun, but what about afterwards? Where will these things "live" in my house?
Those are questions I am much more mindful of this year.
And one other BIG question that I encourage everyone to PLEASE think about... How many evil toxins are going to be created by the batteries needed this year? Last year I went through boxes of AA, AAA and 9V to keep our goodies humming and blinking.
Batteries are a big pet peeve for me, and they put the friggin' things in EVERYTHING these days from action figures to razors to toothbrushes. I've gotten to the point of wanting to scream in the stores "JUST BECAUSE YOU CAN PUT BATTERIES IN IT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD!" Do you think everyone takes these tiny button cells out of the free happy-toy and disposes of them in a responsible manner? ya. right.
Batteries are convenient, portable and powerful.... but they are toxic, environmentally very destructive to manufacture and difficult to dispose of... so why are we putting them in every gizmo they will fit into? Why are they cramming them into things that aren't even enhanced by them?
I am calling for a "No Batteries Christmas" this year.
Is it even possible? So far so good. I haven't bought or asked for anything that needs them (but it's been very difficult in some cases). My usual stocking stuffers are mini flashlights and blinking bouncy balls. NOT THIS YEAR.
Are you with me?
Those are questions I am much more mindful of this year.
And one other BIG question that I encourage everyone to PLEASE think about... How many evil toxins are going to be created by the batteries needed this year? Last year I went through boxes of AA, AAA and 9V to keep our goodies humming and blinking.
Batteries are a big pet peeve for me, and they put the friggin' things in EVERYTHING these days from action figures to razors to toothbrushes. I've gotten to the point of wanting to scream in the stores "JUST BECAUSE YOU CAN PUT BATTERIES IN IT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD!" Do you think everyone takes these tiny button cells out of the free happy-toy and disposes of them in a responsible manner? ya. right.
Batteries are convenient, portable and powerful.... but they are toxic, environmentally very destructive to manufacture and difficult to dispose of... so why are we putting them in every gizmo they will fit into? Why are they cramming them into things that aren't even enhanced by them?
I am calling for a "No Batteries Christmas" this year.
Is it even possible? So far so good. I haven't bought or asked for anything that needs them (but it's been very difficult in some cases). My usual stocking stuffers are mini flashlights and blinking bouncy balls. NOT THIS YEAR.
Are you with me?
11.10.2011
Why I need to stop watching "HOARDERS"
First I need to assume you know which shows I am talking about.... there is "HOARDERS" on A&E and "HOARDING: Buried Alive" on TLC. They are similar in that they about extreme cases of Hoarding (not just too much collecting or a laundry problem) they cover desperate situations each episode and some of the homes are tragic disasters, with animal problems and structural hazards.
I have to stop watching these shows.
Not only do I feel so sorry for the emotional trauma these people are dealing with, I feel fear for them and I come close to a physical illness as the TV people pan through the most intimate and disgusting corners of these people's dwellings. It's BAD and it's a kind of ugly voyeurism into a damaged person's mind.
I am not being too harsh here.
Every single one of the show's participant's had some unresolved traumatic experienced that spiralled out of control on them. And the ones that are actually helped are the ones that respond to the counselling and fix the problems in their heads, not the forced clean-up/gut-out on their homes.
But I'm not going to stop watching just because I think the show is too intrusive or sensationalist -- after all, I think if there are people being helped by this exposure then it should keep going by all means! I have to stop watching because it is influencing my own view of my own stuff, and I don't think in a way that is productive.
Call it a personality flaw, but I am happy with "better" as one of my rules for life.
If whatever I am working on works better or looks better than when I started, then it is a success for me. Also if someone can do something significantly better than me, I'd rather they do it and I'll encourage them to do it too (not too competitive am I?). My task/goal/project doesn't have to be "perfect" or even "the best", it just has to be better than it was to make me feel very happy indeed. And I get a lot out of the small, incremental victories.
Can you see where I'm going with this?
..... my idea of a terrific space is vastly different from these hoarder's spaces. But right now my home looks way "better" than theirs, so it is kind of deflating my forward decluttering momentum because it's not nearly as bad as all that!!!! I need to get better than where I am now, not just feel that I am doing better than them.... otherwise I will fall backwards for sure.
I have to remind myself that I am decluttering for space, peace and balance in my life, not just to have a less clutter or avoid hoarding.
10.29.2011
Surroundings
Unclutterer.com had a post that really got me thinking!
What astonishes me most is how the relationship with surroundings can change (sometimes dramatically) in a relatively short amount of time. I used to feel extreme anxiety in a sparse room... I couldn’t relax, I felt exposed and vulnerable. I felt sorry for people that didn't surround themselves with books and knicknacks and other pretty personal items. Really.... sorry for minimalists! It's laughable. This interaction with my surroundings lasted into my 30s.
Pretty much from the moment I left home for college I was forging ahead on my own, from scratch with nothing to define me except the boxes that I moved into my first apartment and my class list (in a strange town) life was thrust upon me. And it got more full, slowly at first... acquisition of furniture... pursuing a career... then it really got busy!... marriage... home ownership... 2 babies...
I needed my stuff, my stuff needed me - a cozy relationship.
Now at this present point in my life (approaching 40 with lightening speed) the opposite is true, clutter feels heavy like it will squash me and sucks out my freedom with every dust-catching surface, it's emotionally draining and "loud" all the time.
What changed? I have a theory that the more full and stable my life becomes, the less tangible affirmations (aka stuff) I need to define myself to feel confident in my own skin.
Perhaps that is part of what hoarding is about. I am amazed how many of the hoarders (on the TV show) started off as tidy people... only to suffer some tragedy that changes their needs. These people need to feel secure and search for the security with things, it's tragic how messed up (literally) the stuff made everything!
I was a packrat. One personal tragedy away from much worse habits... it's a reality that I'm okay with really. Through love, trust and self-realizations I have come out the other side with a greater respect for my things. Not so much of it means what it used to, and I honestly think that is a very very good thing!
Bravo minimalists for not needing the stuff to be happy. But please don't underestimate the genuine comfort a bit of clutter can provide for anyone that's feeling a bit lost.
The connection between surroundings and perspective
I agree that surroundings influence a person’s sense of comfort and well being on a really visceral level and it's not the same for everyone, in fact it isn't even always the same for ONE person!
Pretty much from the moment I left home for college I was forging ahead on my own, from scratch with nothing to define me except the boxes that I moved into my first apartment and my class list (in a strange town) life was thrust upon me. And it got more full, slowly at first... acquisition of furniture... pursuing a career... then it really got busy!... marriage... home ownership... 2 babies...
I needed my stuff, my stuff needed me - a cozy relationship.
Now at this present point in my life (approaching 40 with lightening speed) the opposite is true, clutter feels heavy like it will squash me and sucks out my freedom with every dust-catching surface, it's emotionally draining and "loud" all the time.
What changed? I have a theory that the more full and stable my life becomes, the less tangible affirmations (aka stuff) I need to define myself to feel confident in my own skin.
Perhaps that is part of what hoarding is about. I am amazed how many of the hoarders (on the TV show) started off as tidy people... only to suffer some tragedy that changes their needs. These people need to feel secure and search for the security with things, it's tragic how messed up (literally) the stuff made everything!
I was a packrat. One personal tragedy away from much worse habits... it's a reality that I'm okay with really. Through love, trust and self-realizations I have come out the other side with a greater respect for my things. Not so much of it means what it used to, and I honestly think that is a very very good thing!
Bravo minimalists for not needing the stuff to be happy. But please don't underestimate the genuine comfort a bit of clutter can provide for anyone that's feeling a bit lost.
10.28.2011
Freedom of Choice -- too much of a good thing?
Yes freedom of choice is AWESOME.
But everything in moderation, right?
There is a wall of yogurt at my grocery store. A whole aisle of cereal and the cheese choices are so plentiful that my store has a wall near the yogurt and 2 more big display areas in the deli. (Did anyone else laugh at the "what's dis?" part of Borat with the cheese? Just me? okay.)
We are so spoiled here it's quite ludicrous.
Other than groceries I'm not a fan of shopping. I know LOTS of folks really love it... I'm just not one of those folks. Its all the choices that do me in.
When I enter a BIG MALL I start off with a tingle of excitement at all the shiny pretty things, then I quickly fade to anxiety over too much choice and too many things that are desirable/novel/expensive, and then a deep funk comes to me that is either tied to buyers remorse, or not being able to find what I entered the mall to buy (despite millions of items being there). The whole process takes about 20 minutes, and if I am determined to get that thing I came for, the funk just gets more and more tedious until I can't stand it anymore and I have to leave. I wish it wasn't like that. I really do.
I have found ways around the anguish of new-stuff-browsing-frustration-overload.
My favourite trick is going to the local thrift shops. Variety is amazing when you get a great thrift shop. Every style, every vintage (and every quality level) is hanging out there. Let's say your in the market for a red, 100% cotton, cable-knit sweater... it takes about 35 seconds to go to the sweater section, look for red, check the size and then the materials label. Nothing there? Great, now you know and your day can continue practically uninterrupted. In the mall it may take 2 hours just to go through those steps (department, colour, size, materials)... and then either come up empty handed or find the only one in the right size that is pleasing is over $100. At the thrift store I know where I stand in my hunt very quickly, I won't be out more than $7 if I do find one, and I already know how it will look after a wash (bonus!). Some people may say that takes the fun out of shopping, but lets be honest here, if the thrift store doesn't have it, it was probably a "want" more than a "need" anyways, so live without it for another day.
(My favourite "score" at a thrift shop... I was in the market for ankle boots, I found PRADA bootlets with a cool chrome heel for $8 -- so comfy, almost too pretty and they have lasted for years).
A trick for staying sane shopping for NEW stuff:
Lets say a toy is needed for a birthday party or some similar scenario (like buying grooming products for example), head straight to the back of the store and check out the clearance section. Don't even look at anything else because you are on a mission. You may find a product you didn't know existed that could be your new favourite. Nine times out of ten something really cool is back there at a deeply discounted price that completely fulfills the buying criteria. If nothing suitable is there, then wander to the proper department and look only at the SALE tags... still no luck? Now you can face the flood of abundance of choice by looking at the full-price items.
Choice is great, I appreciate choices every day. And I choose to look at alternatives to the mall. I choose to re-use and make-do before buying new. My favourite choice is my choice to skip the mall entirely if I can.... my time is more precious, and my money too hard to earn to spend it on glamour and regret.
What are your freedom of choice overload point? Is it eating out? Exercise? Hobbies? Travel Destinations? Gadgets?
But everything in moderation, right?
There is a wall of yogurt at my grocery store. A whole aisle of cereal and the cheese choices are so plentiful that my store has a wall near the yogurt and 2 more big display areas in the deli. (Did anyone else laugh at the "what's dis?" part of Borat with the cheese? Just me? okay.)
We are so spoiled here it's quite ludicrous.
Other than groceries I'm not a fan of shopping. I know LOTS of folks really love it... I'm just not one of those folks. Its all the choices that do me in.
When I enter a BIG MALL I start off with a tingle of excitement at all the shiny pretty things, then I quickly fade to anxiety over too much choice and too many things that are desirable/novel/expensive, and then a deep funk comes to me that is either tied to buyers remorse, or not being able to find what I entered the mall to buy (despite millions of items being there). The whole process takes about 20 minutes, and if I am determined to get that thing I came for, the funk just gets more and more tedious until I can't stand it anymore and I have to leave. I wish it wasn't like that. I really do.
I have found ways around the anguish of new-stuff-browsing-frustration-overload.
My favourite trick is going to the local thrift shops. Variety is amazing when you get a great thrift shop. Every style, every vintage (and every quality level) is hanging out there. Let's say your in the market for a red, 100% cotton, cable-knit sweater... it takes about 35 seconds to go to the sweater section, look for red, check the size and then the materials label. Nothing there? Great, now you know and your day can continue practically uninterrupted. In the mall it may take 2 hours just to go through those steps (department, colour, size, materials)... and then either come up empty handed or find the only one in the right size that is pleasing is over $100. At the thrift store I know where I stand in my hunt very quickly, I won't be out more than $7 if I do find one, and I already know how it will look after a wash (bonus!). Some people may say that takes the fun out of shopping, but lets be honest here, if the thrift store doesn't have it, it was probably a "want" more than a "need" anyways, so live without it for another day.
(My favourite "score" at a thrift shop... I was in the market for ankle boots, I found PRADA bootlets with a cool chrome heel for $8 -- so comfy, almost too pretty and they have lasted for years).
A trick for staying sane shopping for NEW stuff:
Lets say a toy is needed for a birthday party or some similar scenario (like buying grooming products for example), head straight to the back of the store and check out the clearance section. Don't even look at anything else because you are on a mission. You may find a product you didn't know existed that could be your new favourite. Nine times out of ten something really cool is back there at a deeply discounted price that completely fulfills the buying criteria. If nothing suitable is there, then wander to the proper department and look only at the SALE tags... still no luck? Now you can face the flood of abundance of choice by looking at the full-price items.
Choice is great, I appreciate choices every day. And I choose to look at alternatives to the mall. I choose to re-use and make-do before buying new. My favourite choice is my choice to skip the mall entirely if I can.... my time is more precious, and my money too hard to earn to spend it on glamour and regret.
What are your freedom of choice overload point? Is it eating out? Exercise? Hobbies? Travel Destinations? Gadgets?
10.26.2011
Making Time - Making Priorities
When my youngest son broke his right femur 5 years ago, I learned a valuable lesson.
Priorities can change in a heartbeat.
I went from planning my day around emails from clients & meal planning for the family to 24 hours-a-day taking care of Cami in the kid's wing of the hospital... literally in a heartbeat.
That was just a broken leg ("just" being a relative term versus let's say a brain injury or amputation or blindness or something). That snap of the bone changed my world for more than 8 weeks. Suddenly clients were forgotten, personal concerns evaporated, clutter-smutter! Time was irrelevant compared to the tasks and trials that needed attention.
My husband and I took shifts at the hospital around his work and Steve's last few days of school for the year (after all my older boy was still just 9 at the time). Sleeping on a cot was fine, no personal space (because nurses were coming in and checking every hour) was fine too. Living out of a cold, concrete room and walking down the hall to get refreshments was completely reasonable.... because my little boy -- my BABY -- was in traction, in a hospital bed, in a prone position! Going home when each shift was done was a strain on me. The priority for home was: make sure Steve was coping with the weird schedule, shower, eat something healthy, feed the cat, sleep. Clients were completely neglected, housework was left, I ate what was home because the idea of grocery shopping was crazy. In other words my life was turned upside down. In fact, our neighbours, who didn't know what was going on thought maybe my husband and I separated because of the disjointed attendance.
Then 6 weeks in a Spica cast (which included the trunk of his body and full leg) so my little boy was like a mannequin -- frozen in a semi-sitting position -- I had to carry him to the toilet and hold his stiff body there, he slept propped up on pillows, he lost muscle mass, and a whole summer of freedom. Rehab was quick, but painful when the cast came off just before school started.
We did what needed to be done. We adjusted, we all found a new "normal" and we carried on.
The lasting effect of this experience for me was the knowledge that sh!t happens then life goes on. All priorities can be tossed aside, and time can be found for anything if it's important/urgent enough.
Current priorities (alphabetically):
- Family - Finances - Friendships - Health - Home - Personal Growth -
the question is what order are these in? I know which ones SHOULD come first, but "urgent" matters (not necessarily important matter) intervene often enough to bump them all over the list.
It's nice to take a conscious minute to slow down and think about my priorities, really think about them, instead of just constantly reacting to what life throws my way.
Priorities can change in a heartbeat.
I went from planning my day around emails from clients & meal planning for the family to 24 hours-a-day taking care of Cami in the kid's wing of the hospital... literally in a heartbeat.
That was just a broken leg ("just" being a relative term versus let's say a brain injury or amputation or blindness or something). That snap of the bone changed my world for more than 8 weeks. Suddenly clients were forgotten, personal concerns evaporated, clutter-smutter! Time was irrelevant compared to the tasks and trials that needed attention.
My husband and I took shifts at the hospital around his work and Steve's last few days of school for the year (after all my older boy was still just 9 at the time). Sleeping on a cot was fine, no personal space (because nurses were coming in and checking every hour) was fine too. Living out of a cold, concrete room and walking down the hall to get refreshments was completely reasonable.... because my little boy -- my BABY -- was in traction, in a hospital bed, in a prone position! Going home when each shift was done was a strain on me. The priority for home was: make sure Steve was coping with the weird schedule, shower, eat something healthy, feed the cat, sleep. Clients were completely neglected, housework was left, I ate what was home because the idea of grocery shopping was crazy. In other words my life was turned upside down. In fact, our neighbours, who didn't know what was going on thought maybe my husband and I separated because of the disjointed attendance.
Then 6 weeks in a Spica cast (which included the trunk of his body and full leg) so my little boy was like a mannequin -- frozen in a semi-sitting position -- I had to carry him to the toilet and hold his stiff body there, he slept propped up on pillows, he lost muscle mass, and a whole summer of freedom. Rehab was quick, but painful when the cast came off just before school started.
We did what needed to be done. We adjusted, we all found a new "normal" and we carried on.
The lasting effect of this experience for me was the knowledge that sh!t happens then life goes on. All priorities can be tossed aside, and time can be found for anything if it's important/urgent enough.
Current priorities (alphabetically):
- Family - Finances - Friendships - Health - Home - Personal Growth -
the question is what order are these in? I know which ones SHOULD come first, but "urgent" matters (not necessarily important matter) intervene often enough to bump them all over the list.
It's nice to take a conscious minute to slow down and think about my priorities, really think about them, instead of just constantly reacting to what life throws my way.
10.22.2011
Inventory Time - food edition
Inventory time on the pantry/freezer situation!
Food is a passion of mine. Cooking - Eating - Shopping. And one way I "indulge" is by stocking up... it can be a little on the crazy side (depending on how vulnerable I feel) at times. The good news is that I now recognize that I don't have to save up for a catastrophe -- at least not an apocalyptic one -- and just because it's on sale doesn't mean I need to buy 24 of it either. There are positives that I can't deny, for example, one things is certain... I can ALWAYS come up with a decent meal with savoury seasonings and full, satisfying portions for the whole family from my pantry at any time.
Today was the day I dug everything from my freezer and took inventory. This exercise is very revealing... for instance I found out that I really like buying frozen fish fillets. I do, in fact, like eating fish, but rarely chose to make it. VOILA an excess of Basa and Sole in the freezer (about 7 pounds). And blueberries.... LOTS of blueberries.... 6 bags (I now know without a shadow of a doubt what kind of smoothies we will be having for breakfast for a LONG time). And I'm not sure how I managed to forget to use the cranberries and then buy more -- 5 times!
Other insights... 8 family servings of Edamame... 6 deep dish pie crusts... 3 big ziplock bags of chicken stock... 4 containers of homemade pesto... 1 turkey... 3 bags of corn...
I could go on, but I won't.
Apparently I need to do this sort of inventory more often.
To help prevent further duplicates, I have sorted my uprightfreezer into "zones": Meat/Fish, Veggies, Fruit, meal helpers (pizza, eggrolls, etc), desserts (pie/icecream), juices. The kitchen freezer is reserved for opened bags of fruit/veg and bread. Now I can open the door and see immediately that the fruit shelf is FULL. No more fruit to buy please -- resist the aisle at the store -- resist! And I can also see that there are only 3 cans of orange juice... that's okay, I can wait until there are none before buying more.
Sigh...I want to make a big batch of lasagna to freeze, but today I realized that is impossible until there is room in my freezer. Motivation to avoid buying anything that must be frozen for a little while. (It won't be long, boys eat a LOT of food these days).
Feeling motivated by the freezer discoveries I decided to do the canned goods pantry. My list had fallen out of service -- time to update it! A whole other set of revelations in there... and not where I thought. I discovered I don't have any baked beans, not one can (weird considering I usually buy case lots of them). I only have 1 can of kidney beans (so a batch of chili would have to wait for a shopping trip) and now that my husband doesn't like salt he doesn't take the chunky soups for lunch anymore (but apparently I'm still buying them -- I have 12 cans).
Taking inventory is very good.
In one stroke I feel comfortable with the food I have, know what I need (and what I don't) and can confidently open the door to make dinner.... oh and I can CLOSE the doors too! That's a major thing for a borderline food hoarder.
Food is a passion of mine. Cooking - Eating - Shopping. And one way I "indulge" is by stocking up... it can be a little on the crazy side (depending on how vulnerable I feel) at times. The good news is that I now recognize that I don't have to save up for a catastrophe -- at least not an apocalyptic one -- and just because it's on sale doesn't mean I need to buy 24 of it either. There are positives that I can't deny, for example, one things is certain... I can ALWAYS come up with a decent meal with savoury seasonings and full, satisfying portions for the whole family from my pantry at any time.
Today was the day I dug everything from my freezer and took inventory. This exercise is very revealing... for instance I found out that I really like buying frozen fish fillets. I do, in fact, like eating fish, but rarely chose to make it. VOILA an excess of Basa and Sole in the freezer (about 7 pounds). And blueberries.... LOTS of blueberries.... 6 bags (I now know without a shadow of a doubt what kind of smoothies we will be having for breakfast for a LONG time). And I'm not sure how I managed to forget to use the cranberries and then buy more -- 5 times!
Other insights... 8 family servings of Edamame... 6 deep dish pie crusts... 3 big ziplock bags of chicken stock... 4 containers of homemade pesto... 1 turkey... 3 bags of corn...
I could go on, but I won't.
Apparently I need to do this sort of inventory more often.
To help prevent further duplicates, I have sorted my uprightfreezer into "zones": Meat/Fish, Veggies, Fruit, meal helpers (pizza, eggrolls, etc), desserts (pie/icecream), juices. The kitchen freezer is reserved for opened bags of fruit/veg and bread. Now I can open the door and see immediately that the fruit shelf is FULL. No more fruit to buy please -- resist the aisle at the store -- resist! And I can also see that there are only 3 cans of orange juice... that's okay, I can wait until there are none before buying more.
Sigh...I want to make a big batch of lasagna to freeze, but today I realized that is impossible until there is room in my freezer. Motivation to avoid buying anything that must be frozen for a little while. (It won't be long, boys eat a LOT of food these days).
Feeling motivated by the freezer discoveries I decided to do the canned goods pantry. My list had fallen out of service -- time to update it! A whole other set of revelations in there... and not where I thought. I discovered I don't have any baked beans, not one can (weird considering I usually buy case lots of them). I only have 1 can of kidney beans (so a batch of chili would have to wait for a shopping trip) and now that my husband doesn't like salt he doesn't take the chunky soups for lunch anymore (but apparently I'm still buying them -- I have 12 cans).
Taking inventory is very good.
In one stroke I feel comfortable with the food I have, know what I need (and what I don't) and can confidently open the door to make dinner.... oh and I can CLOSE the doors too! That's a major thing for a borderline food hoarder.
10.21.2011
More = Christmas
How can I simplify the season of excess?
Chrsitmas compared to all the other seasons is defined by MORE.
More decorations, more lights, more food, more gifts, more social events, more treats, more eggnog & rum, more baking, more shopping, more packaging..... more... more.... more....
The problem with my desire to simplify is that I like the lights, glitter and cheer... I like the trees and the happy, charged atmosphere.
In recent years I have enforced a limit on my Christmas paraphernalia...a real, physical limit. ALL the Christmas stuff must fit in my Grandfather's Steamer chest at the end of the season... no exceptions. So if I really want another ornament, I have to be prepared to let something of the same size go, the chest is full to capacity, that is a reality. It also keeps my storage solutions simple and out of sight for the rest of the year. A necessity.
The space in my home within my own 4 walls is under control for Christmas, GREAT!
But.... no matter how much I may want it, it's not all about ME or what I want...
Not just an excuse to decorate, Christmas is a time for generosity, thankfulness and giving... however I don't appreciate the chaos and spending that goes along with it. I feel taken for a ride on the Consumerism Express. The adults understand for the most part and I would be tempted to have a "no presents" Christmas with a loving and well thought out excuse to the family... however...
I have 2 sons with many years of experience getting major Christmas hauls.
I have 3 nieces of serious Christmas-magic age.
I have 2 nephews of toy crazy age too
and they have a full family of Grandparents, Aunts, Uncles and Parents that may not be on the same frugal-minimalist agenda that I am. That's the trap isn't it?!
I love them VERY much.
LOVE = GIFTS at Christmas...
...or at least that sure is how it looks to the impressionable munchkins.
I will have to do more research on how to give them a memorable and loving impression without adding to the clutter-junk-disposable toy cycle. I refuse to have my affections be just another toy on the pile this year.
Experience gifts are a good option. But I feel guilty that to use the gifts (lets say a movie pass) some of the nieces and nephews have to take a ferry and drive (taking parent time and money) hmm...I'm thinking.... part of the gift could be myself picking them up from the ferry and taking the to the experience, couldn't it!? I'll have to think about that some more, it may not be practical after all.
Now that the juices are flowing here I'm pretty sure I can think up clutter-free gifts for most of my list. I don't want to spoil it but here are some ideas (If you think you may be on my list, please don't read farther).
How about:
...museum membership, satellite radio subscription, a ride on a helicopter, one-meal-per-month-for-a-year-at-my-house vouchers, bouquet-a-month for an out of town relative, Movie passes, subscription, swimming lessons, art lessons, pottery class (fun with friends!) big batch of treats (freezable so they don't have to feel like a glutton), yoga-night once a week at a friend's, garden plant...
The problem is still there though (2 problems really) How can I simplify this season of excess? How can I still say I love somebody at Christmas without giving them something to unwrap?
Chrsitmas compared to all the other seasons is defined by MORE.
More decorations, more lights, more food, more gifts, more social events, more treats, more eggnog & rum, more baking, more shopping, more packaging..... more... more.... more....
The problem with my desire to simplify is that I like the lights, glitter and cheer... I like the trees and the happy, charged atmosphere.
In recent years I have enforced a limit on my Christmas paraphernalia...a real, physical limit. ALL the Christmas stuff must fit in my Grandfather's Steamer chest at the end of the season... no exceptions. So if I really want another ornament, I have to be prepared to let something of the same size go, the chest is full to capacity, that is a reality. It also keeps my storage solutions simple and out of sight for the rest of the year. A necessity.
The space in my home within my own 4 walls is under control for Christmas, GREAT!
But.... no matter how much I may want it, it's not all about ME or what I want...
Not just an excuse to decorate, Christmas is a time for generosity, thankfulness and giving... however I don't appreciate the chaos and spending that goes along with it. I feel taken for a ride on the Consumerism Express. The adults understand for the most part and I would be tempted to have a "no presents" Christmas with a loving and well thought out excuse to the family... however...
I have 2 sons with many years of experience getting major Christmas hauls.
I have 3 nieces of serious Christmas-magic age.
I have 2 nephews of toy crazy age too
and they have a full family of Grandparents, Aunts, Uncles and Parents that may not be on the same frugal-minimalist agenda that I am. That's the trap isn't it?!
I love them VERY much.
LOVE = GIFTS at Christmas...
...or at least that sure is how it looks to the impressionable munchkins.
I will have to do more research on how to give them a memorable and loving impression without adding to the clutter-junk-disposable toy cycle. I refuse to have my affections be just another toy on the pile this year.
Experience gifts are a good option. But I feel guilty that to use the gifts (lets say a movie pass) some of the nieces and nephews have to take a ferry and drive (taking parent time and money) hmm...I'm thinking.... part of the gift could be myself picking them up from the ferry and taking the to the experience, couldn't it!? I'll have to think about that some more, it may not be practical after all.
Now that the juices are flowing here I'm pretty sure I can think up clutter-free gifts for most of my list. I don't want to spoil it but here are some ideas (If you think you may be on my list, please don't read farther).
How about:
...museum membership, satellite radio subscription, a ride on a helicopter, one-meal-per-month-for-a-year-at-my-house vouchers, bouquet-a-month for an out of town relative, Movie passes, subscription, swimming lessons, art lessons, pottery class (fun with friends!) big batch of treats (freezable so they don't have to feel like a glutton), yoga-night once a week at a friend's, garden plant...
The problem is still there though (2 problems really) How can I simplify this season of excess? How can I still say I love somebody at Christmas without giving them something to unwrap?
10.17.2011
Christmas ( + Other Clutter Occasions)
Don't hate me for mentioning it in October... I like to get the shopping done early.... CHRISTMAS IS COMING!
Before kids it was an easy occasion to look forward to. I'd head to mom or dad's (or the in-laws) for all day eating and present opening. Some traditional tunes in the background (Boney-M is my personal fave) and then, fat and happy, I'd roll home with my haul.
NOW... 2 boys later... I dread the big day, actually the WHOLE MONTH. It's non stop stuff morning noon and night. (The great disadvantage to living so close to so many family members is the endless people to buy for and the endless toys that come from all of them.)
Honestly I have gift-fatigue in a BIG way. I really don't know how to tell them I hate it. I can't deprive the relatives from seeing the delighted faces of my boys when they get their gifts, and I can't deprive my boys from it either -- can I?
Maybe in about 3 years (oldest will be 18, youngest 14) we can disapear to somewhere warm and far away for the holidays... is that cheating? Bring everyone back an edible souvenir? Vanilla Beans, coffee, chocolate or if we are feeling like Hawaii is the place to hide, sweet sweet macadamia nuts!
In the past I have experimented with gift exchanging. One year I insisted we only get handmade things. Another year I asked for "experience" gifts, and another year I said no adult presents, family gifts only. Well it all failed miserably because only SOME people respected my requests. Then the day would come and some people went overboard, some people got left out (because they were playing along) and some people just did whatever the heck they wanted to.... hey, it's their Christmas too, who am I to make the rules???
I guess I should just shut up and ride the peer-pressure treadmill for the last few years before the kids are grown... but I don't want to. I really don't.
So do YOU have a plan for averting the gift-avalanche this upcoming season?
Or for that matter, any gift occasion? Birthday, Easter (how did that get gifty anyways?), etc...?
Before kids it was an easy occasion to look forward to. I'd head to mom or dad's (or the in-laws) for all day eating and present opening. Some traditional tunes in the background (Boney-M is my personal fave) and then, fat and happy, I'd roll home with my haul.
NOW... 2 boys later... I dread the big day, actually the WHOLE MONTH. It's non stop stuff morning noon and night. (The great disadvantage to living so close to so many family members is the endless people to buy for and the endless toys that come from all of them.)
Honestly I have gift-fatigue in a BIG way. I really don't know how to tell them I hate it. I can't deprive the relatives from seeing the delighted faces of my boys when they get their gifts, and I can't deprive my boys from it either -- can I?
Maybe in about 3 years (oldest will be 18, youngest 14) we can disapear to somewhere warm and far away for the holidays... is that cheating? Bring everyone back an edible souvenir? Vanilla Beans, coffee, chocolate or if we are feeling like Hawaii is the place to hide, sweet sweet macadamia nuts!
In the past I have experimented with gift exchanging. One year I insisted we only get handmade things. Another year I asked for "experience" gifts, and another year I said no adult presents, family gifts only. Well it all failed miserably because only SOME people respected my requests. Then the day would come and some people went overboard, some people got left out (because they were playing along) and some people just did whatever the heck they wanted to.... hey, it's their Christmas too, who am I to make the rules???
I guess I should just shut up and ride the peer-pressure treadmill for the last few years before the kids are grown... but I don't want to. I really don't.
So do YOU have a plan for averting the gift-avalanche this upcoming season?
Or for that matter, any gift occasion? Birthday, Easter (how did that get gifty anyways?), etc...?
10.14.2011
Short but sweet
No time to write these days, but no time to shop either!
I have squeezed out a few missions of decluttering in between jobs -- nothing that couldn't be done in 15 minutes or less. So nothing deep. I did get brutal with purging the summer linens as I brought out the fall ones. I am getting rid of twin size, summer-weight duvets (2 of them) -- the duct tape holding a seam together is the dead givaway that I've been too clingy to these items. Also a feather pillow that suddenly decided to puke feathers all over my boy's room (no rips, just coming right through the ticking!)... can feather pillows be composted I wonder? Right now it's in a bag waiting for proper disposal
I also said goodbye to 2 pairs of very pretty shoes that pinch, it wasn't easy because both pairs are Italian and unique... but come on they aren't house decorations, they are footwear, so if I can't wear them on my feet, they need to go to someone else's!
+ another jacket
+ a CD holder
+ some decorative items that I wasn't "seeing" anymore
+ a few craft items
I've been putting these things in boxes and bags... no time to run to the charity to get them out of here though. I HAVE TO GET THESE BOXES AND BAGS OF DECLUTTERED THINGS OUT OF MY OFFICE!
Update on my sister "robbing" me:
She won't do it.
She says I have decluttered enough and she can't think of anything that's too much or out of place now. Oh how little she knows where I'm going!!!!! I will need to find a true minimalist to help me with this cleansing plan.
Baby steps to see my space lighten up. It's important to me. My time is too valuable to be buried all the time.
I have squeezed out a few missions of decluttering in between jobs -- nothing that couldn't be done in 15 minutes or less. So nothing deep. I did get brutal with purging the summer linens as I brought out the fall ones. I am getting rid of twin size, summer-weight duvets (2 of them) -- the duct tape holding a seam together is the dead givaway that I've been too clingy to these items. Also a feather pillow that suddenly decided to puke feathers all over my boy's room (no rips, just coming right through the ticking!)... can feather pillows be composted I wonder? Right now it's in a bag waiting for proper disposal
I also said goodbye to 2 pairs of very pretty shoes that pinch, it wasn't easy because both pairs are Italian and unique... but come on they aren't house decorations, they are footwear, so if I can't wear them on my feet, they need to go to someone else's!
+ another jacket
+ a CD holder
+ some decorative items that I wasn't "seeing" anymore
+ a few craft items
I've been putting these things in boxes and bags... no time to run to the charity to get them out of here though. I HAVE TO GET THESE BOXES AND BAGS OF DECLUTTERED THINGS OUT OF MY OFFICE!
Update on my sister "robbing" me:
She won't do it.
She says I have decluttered enough and she can't think of anything that's too much or out of place now. Oh how little she knows where I'm going!!!!! I will need to find a true minimalist to help me with this cleansing plan.
Baby steps to see my space lighten up. It's important to me. My time is too valuable to be buried all the time.
10.04.2011
Slippery Slope of Crap
As I mentioned last post, my busy work season is here. And unfortunately, my decluttering efforts have stalled as a result.
The thing that really confuses me is where all this stuff is coming from to smother me? After all, I don't have time to even think about shopping!
So here I am at my desk feeling buried by the same old stuff even though I thought I already got rid of the desk clutter... but there it is. Same crap. Different pile.
Not enough time in the day to be super-mom, super-wife, super-designer AND super-declutterer. I still amd confused about the source of the mess though. It must be me, because it's my stuff. But when? Where? How? did it find it's way onto my desk and around my feet?
I feel like I want to do a major purge... I mean MAJOR (I still have to talk to my sister about "robbing me") otherwise if I am going to have to keep sitting in all this poop, I will surely go mad.
(Sorry, it felt like a rant day today).
9.27.2011
Busy Times = Less Purging
It's my "busy season" for work right now. I look forward to the creative shot in the arm that living, breathing and sleeping with my work makes happen, but the rest of my plans tend to get de-railed (at least temporarily).
So if I'm not posting like I used to, don't be alarmed. I'll be back with new tales of clutter crusades, moments of minimalist inspiration and progress photos by the time the trick-or-treaters have haunted my front steps....
TTFN, I hope I don't get buried by the neglected accumulation over the next few weeks.
So if I'm not posting like I used to, don't be alarmed. I'll be back with new tales of clutter crusades, moments of minimalist inspiration and progress photos by the time the trick-or-treaters have haunted my front steps....
TTFN, I hope I don't get buried by the neglected accumulation over the next few weeks.
9.21.2011
Handing Over the Reins
Miss Minimalist is one of my regular reads. And one segment she does regularly is "real life minimalist" where the minimalist shares their journey in their own words... very cool stuff reading the different motivations for simpler living. This week it is Sandi, and her story is of living abroad and of being robbed a few times motivating her to really evaluate the true value of her possessions.
It got me thinking. My hang-up is not my desire to live with less, my stumbling block is making the decision of what to keep. How can I simplify this process?
Experiment Time:. I am going to let my sister "rob" me one afternoon. I will provide boxes and tape, and she can box up anything that she thinks I can live with out. If I don't miss the items after 60 days I will be donating the boxes to my friend Spider for her charity work.... if I do miss an item, my sister can remove it from the box (without me seeing what else is in there).
(Even writing this out gives me shivers of fear, so I think it could be a very telling exercise!)
I'll keep you posted as to when this will happen....
It got me thinking. My hang-up is not my desire to live with less, my stumbling block is making the decision of what to keep. How can I simplify this process?
Experiment Time:. I am going to let my sister "rob" me one afternoon. I will provide boxes and tape, and she can box up anything that she thinks I can live with out. If I don't miss the items after 60 days I will be donating the boxes to my friend Spider for her charity work.... if I do miss an item, my sister can remove it from the box (without me seeing what else is in there).
(Even writing this out gives me shivers of fear, so I think it could be a very telling exercise!)
I'll keep you posted as to when this will happen....
9.11.2011
Tough Measures
Boosted by my successful release of 4 boxes, 2 bags and a piece of furniture yesterday (all from my stuff stored at my sister for the "sale" of our home (ugh), I am waging war on my storage shelves in the basement today.
I am happy to report that the boys agreed to let go of 3 really bulky remote control vehicles and a pair of roller blades - straight off to the charity shop. The oldest boy SOLD his long board for $30 last week after finally admitting that he preferred his bikes by about a million percent too! (proud mommy)
I am horrified at the volume of crap that me, my husband and our 2 boys have been clinging to with the lame excuse of "having the space". It would be truly wonderful to cut my shelving in half to be able to tuck my freezer in the space instead... I am getting there, slowly but surely.
My focus has to be on the goal. It is a mountain that I am determined to climb. Like an alcoholic that has tried to quit a thousand times, my clutter habit (the fact that I keep bringing stuff home) is not going away just by knowing it's the right thing to quit. It's not even enough to know the benefits of quitting or WANTING to quit. I have to feel it in my bones that's it's life or death. I have to beleive with all my heart that that phase of my life is truly, once and for all, OVER. The packrat must retire her bins, boxes and attachments. She must find the strength to overcome bad habits, the fortitude to NOT look at garage sales, thrift stores or sales racks. She must find it within herself to say NO to hand-me-downs that look useful and recognize when enough is enough... and whoah baby do I have enough!
The original Twelve Steps as published by Alcoholics Anonymous* can easily be adapted to what us serious recovering packrats should follow:
In addition to the physical decluttering, I will be going on a spending diet. I pledge to only buy immediately consumable items (ie: food, fuel, paper products) until Halloween - unless there is an absolute emergency of course. That's only 51 days, I am quite sure I can manage that!
The boys have enough clothes, the school supplies are in their bags, there are no birthdays for a bit and there is nothing I "need" right away. To launch this endeavour I will be pantry-shopping for as long as I can... it'll give my canned goods and freezer items a good use-it-up rotation!
I am happy to report that the boys agreed to let go of 3 really bulky remote control vehicles and a pair of roller blades - straight off to the charity shop. The oldest boy SOLD his long board for $30 last week after finally admitting that he preferred his bikes by about a million percent too! (proud mommy)
I am horrified at the volume of crap that me, my husband and our 2 boys have been clinging to with the lame excuse of "having the space". It would be truly wonderful to cut my shelving in half to be able to tuck my freezer in the space instead... I am getting there, slowly but surely.
My focus has to be on the goal. It is a mountain that I am determined to climb. Like an alcoholic that has tried to quit a thousand times, my clutter habit (the fact that I keep bringing stuff home) is not going away just by knowing it's the right thing to quit. It's not even enough to know the benefits of quitting or WANTING to quit. I have to feel it in my bones that's it's life or death. I have to beleive with all my heart that that phase of my life is truly, once and for all, OVER. The packrat must retire her bins, boxes and attachments. She must find the strength to overcome bad habits, the fortitude to NOT look at garage sales, thrift stores or sales racks. She must find it within herself to say NO to hand-me-downs that look useful and recognize when enough is enough... and whoah baby do I have enough!
The original Twelve Steps as published by Alcoholics Anonymous* can easily be adapted to what us serious recovering packrats should follow:
1.We admitted we were powerless over [the potenially useful items]—that our lives had become unmanageable.
2.Came to believe that [less stuff] could restore us to sanity.
3.Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of [faith in what we can do with less].
4.Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves [and our stuff].
5.Admitted to ourselves, and to other human beings the exact nature of our wrongs [that we let be in our home]
6.Were entirely ready to remove all these defects of character [and obstructive things].
7.Humbly ask [thrift shops, charities and garbage disposal] to remove our [excess stuff].
8.Made a list of all [spaces] we had harmed, and became willing to make amends to them all.
9.Made direct amends to [remaining valued belongings] wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others.
10.Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it.
11.Sought through [careful consideration of belongings] to improve our conscious contact with [our true space and core values] and the power to carry that out.
12.Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to [packrats/shopaholics] and to practice these principles in all our affairs.* I mean absolutely NO disrespect to AA, I am just drawing a parallel from one addiction to another and honouring these proven steps that work so very well for so many sufferers.
In addition to the physical decluttering, I will be going on a spending diet. I pledge to only buy immediately consumable items (ie: food, fuel, paper products) until Halloween - unless there is an absolute emergency of course. That's only 51 days, I am quite sure I can manage that!
The boys have enough clothes, the school supplies are in their bags, there are no birthdays for a bit and there is nothing I "need" right away. To launch this endeavour I will be pantry-shopping for as long as I can... it'll give my canned goods and freezer items a good use-it-up rotation!
9.05.2011
Avalanche
Yesterday I went to my sister's house and got serious about clearing MY stuff out of there from when our house was staged.
My husband almost cried over the volume of crap returning to the house.... he was loving the show-home level of clean and tidy.
Box after box stacked into the pickup truck (and I have one more trip to make!). I decided to approach one box at a time before it came into the house and deal with the contents immediately before really letting any stay. I talked the boys into filling one box each of their stuff to donate (I bribed them) and collected one bag of trash. With my stuff I have filled 2 boxes (and counting) of donatable items, and one special box of more valuable stuff for my friend Spider's fundraising.
Still... I'm nowhere even close to coming to terms with the influx of belongings... ugh.
Smothered, smothered, smothered. The tea cupboard is ready to burst again, and so are the spices... a month without a dozen varieties of herbal tea wasn't really that bad.... maybe I should just ditch them. How many bags of different kinds of hot-chili rubs do I really need when only one of them is my favourite?
Obviously I still ahve some purging to do before this avalanche of new old stuff threatens to bury me.
My husband almost cried over the volume of crap returning to the house.... he was loving the show-home level of clean and tidy.
Box after box stacked into the pickup truck (and I have one more trip to make!). I decided to approach one box at a time before it came into the house and deal with the contents immediately before really letting any stay. I talked the boys into filling one box each of their stuff to donate (I bribed them) and collected one bag of trash. With my stuff I have filled 2 boxes (and counting) of donatable items, and one special box of more valuable stuff for my friend Spider's fundraising.
Still... I'm nowhere even close to coming to terms with the influx of belongings... ugh.
Smothered, smothered, smothered. The tea cupboard is ready to burst again, and so are the spices... a month without a dozen varieties of herbal tea wasn't really that bad.... maybe I should just ditch them. How many bags of different kinds of hot-chili rubs do I really need when only one of them is my favourite?
Obviously I still ahve some purging to do before this avalanche of new old stuff threatens to bury me.
9.03.2011
Bye Bye
I have a sock thing. I love socks. They are a cheap source of happy for me.... but enough is enough.
Today I purged:
7 pairs of boring socks.
2 t-shirts
1 pair of shoes
a few toys (shhh.... don't tell the kdis)
1 pair of capris that I haven't even tried to wear this summer
oh ya baby, that feels good! what else can I find?
Today I purged:
7 pairs of boring socks.
2 t-shirts
1 pair of shoes
a few toys (shhh.... don't tell the kdis)
1 pair of capris that I haven't even tried to wear this summer
oh ya baby, that feels good! what else can I find?
9.01.2011
It all has to come home
Now that my house is back OFF the market, I need to make some tough desicions about what is coming back into the house.
I parked some of the de-personalizing boxes of things in my sister's garage, but now they have to come home. Living in a "show home" was really quite nice (see my other post on that). It won't be easy. I will fight every box I'm sure. There were some things that I genuinely missed... but most things that I have pretty much forgotten about.
So far :
- a box of toiletries has been gone through... not too much luck there, I removed some perfumed lotions and some old nail polishes.
- a box of office stuff... I cleared out enough books from my bookshelf to find space for this box of circa 1960s Popular Mechanics Magazines (I still love them). TTFN seldom-used-reference books!
2 boxes down, 30 more to go!
I parked some of the de-personalizing boxes of things in my sister's garage, but now they have to come home. Living in a "show home" was really quite nice (see my other post on that). It won't be easy. I will fight every box I'm sure. There were some things that I genuinely missed... but most things that I have pretty much forgotten about.
So far :
- a box of toiletries has been gone through... not too much luck there, I removed some perfumed lotions and some old nail polishes.
- a box of office stuff... I cleared out enough books from my bookshelf to find space for this box of circa 1960s Popular Mechanics Magazines (I still love them). TTFN seldom-used-reference books!
2 boxes down, 30 more to go!
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